--- /dev/null
+He who controls the source controls the universe!
+Want to see a listing of files installed by a package, type dpkg -L package
+Need to know the status of a package? type dpkg -s package
+Need help, but everyone is idle in the channel, try emailing to debian-user@lists.debian.org
+Need to see the list of packages matching a pattern, type dpkg -l pattern
+If you have a webserver and dww packages installed, try http://localhost/dwww for all kinds of documentation
+Need help setting up PPP? read /usr/doc/ppp/README.debian
+Want to know why Debian is best? type !why in the channel
+Want to upgrade to hamm (unstable)? type !libc6 to get the mini-HOWTO
+Want to check out Debian social contract? type !dfsg in the channel
+Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
+Daddy, why doesn't this magnet pick up this floppy disk?
+Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
+I.R.S.: We've got what it takes to take what you've got!
+We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
+Pentiums melt in your PC, not in your hand.
+Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
+Did anyone see my lost carrier?
+Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
+I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing!
+He who laughs last thinks slowest!
+Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
+'More hay, Trigger?' 'No thanks, Roy, I'm stuffed!'
+A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
+Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
+There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
+Artificial Intelligence usually beats real stupidity.
+Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
+Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
+I won't rise to the occaasion, but I'll slide over to it.
+Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I.
+Double your drive space - delete Windows!
+What is a 'free' gift ? Aren't all gifts free?
+If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.
+'Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.'
+Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.
+Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
+Oops. My brain just hit a bad sector.
+I used to have a handle on life, then it broke.
+Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.
+I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
+Better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot.
+The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
+When there's a will, I want to be in it.
+Okay, who put a 'stop payment' on my reality check?
+Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
+I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar.
+We have enough youth, how about a fountain of SMART?
+All generalizations are false, including this one.
+Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
+C program run. C program crash. C programmer quit.
+'Criminal Lawyer' is a redundancy.
+Clap on! (clap, clap) Clap off! (clap@#&$NO CARRIER
+'640K ought to be enough for anybody.' Bill Gates '81
+'90% of all statistics are made up'
+'A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.'
+'A little work, a little sleep, a little love and it is all over.' - R. Frost
+'A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.' -Doug Larson
+'Apple' (c) 6024 b.c., Adam & Eve
+'Apple' (c) Copyright 1767, Sir Isaac Newton.
+'Bad knee, gotta run' - Pat Buchanan to his draft board
+'Beam me aboard, Scotty.' 'Sure. Will a 2x10 do?'
+'Beulah, peel me a grape.'
+'Bother,' said Pooh as the brakes went out!
+'Build a watch in 179 easy steps' by C. Forsberg.
+'C++' should have been called 'D'
+'COINCIDENCE' happens.
+'Calvin, we will not have an anatomically correct snowman!'
+'Careful. We don't want to learn from this.' -- Calvin
+'Don't you hate it when your boogers freeze?' -- Calvin
+'Every time I've built character, I've regretted it.'
+'Freedom defined is freedom denied.' -The Illuminatus
+'Have you ever dated somebody because you were too lazy to commit suicide?'
+'Hi-ho, hi-ho, it's hand grenades I throw...'
+'Hmm... How *did* they finally kill Frosty?' -- Hobbes
+'Human equality is a contingent fact of history.' -Steven Jay Gould
+'I tried to think but nothing happened!' - Curly
+'I'm not an actor, but I play one on TV'
+'I'm not smart enough to lie' - Ronald Reagan
+'If I knew what I was doing...I'd be dangerous...'
+'If the shoe fits, buy it.' Imelda Marcos
+'Instant gratification takes too long.' - Carrie Fisher
+'Is' is the verb for when you don't want a verb.
+'It is not the fall that kills you. it's the sudden stop at the end.'-D. Adams
+'It's sad how whole families are torn apart by simple things, like wild dogs'
+'Keyboard? How quaint!' - Scotty
+'Luke... Luke... Use the MOUSE, Luke' - Obi Wan Gates
+'Mr. Worf, blow the Windows-powered Borg ship out of this Universe!'
+'Off the keyboard, thru the router, over the bridge, nothing but net!'
+'Quotations are for people who are not saying things worth quoting.'
+'Remember when we said there was no future? Well, this is it.' -- Blank Regk
+'Stupid' is a boundless concept.
+'Suicide Hotline...please hold.'
+'The faster you go, the shorter you are' - Einstein
+'The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.' - Mark Twain
+'The sun ain't yellow, its chicken.' -Bob Dylan
+'There are lies, damned lies, and statistics.' -Mark Twain
+'There's someone in my head, but its not me.' -Pink Floyd
+'This is a job for.. AACK! WAAUGHHH!! ...someone else.' -
+'To err is human, to forgive....$5.00'
+'Ummm, Trouble with grammar have I! Yes!' -Yoda-
+'Vote for Perot' - Bumper sticker attached with Velcro
+'You can't have everything. Where would you put it?' -Steven Wright
+#1 OS/2 tip: Drag the Windows folder to the shreader!!!
+#include std/disclaimer.h
+$$$ not found -- (A)bort (R)efinance (B)ankrupt
+'Tis better to be thought a fool, then to open your mouth and remove all doubt
+(((((This tagline in Stereo where available)))))
+(A)bort (R)etry (C)ut Your Throat.....
+(A)bort (R)etry (F)ail (U)nplug & (S)ell.
+(A)bort (R)etry (P)ull leg (H)ot boot (S)wipe tagline!
+(A)bort, (R)etry, (I)nfluence with large hammer
+(A)bort, (R)etry, (P)retend this never happened...
+(D)inner not ready: (A)bort (R)etry (P)izza
+(You can have your cake) XOR (You can eat your cake)
+(c) Copywight 1995 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved.
+* OLX 3 * Windows is to OS/2 what Etch-a-Sketch is to art.
+*Four hours* to bury a cat? Yes - it wouldn't keep still
+.. Bugs come in through open Windows.
+... 'I'll be Bach.' - Johann Sebastian Schwarzenegger
+... All the world's a stage, and I missed rehearsal.
+... Bill Clinton isn't slick. He's just a liar.
+... Clinton Economics: If 1+2=3 then 4+5=6.
+... Clinton excuse #15: Hey - I just do what the wife says
+... Clinton excuse #18: You took that seriously? Har har
+... Clinton sandwich: $5 of baloney and $20 in taxes
+... Getting the truth from Clinton is like nailing Jello
+... It's tourist season in Florida, bag limit two.
+... KARAOKE is Japanese for 'Tone Deaf'
+... Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant
+.....If it ain't broke, fix it anyway just to screw it up!
+...I'm sorry, Reality is not in service at this time.
+...On the other hand, you have different fingers.
+..Windows NT Performance', on the next 'In Search Of'
+/EARTH is 98% full. Please delete anybody you can
+1 + 1 = ? Ask my calculator.
+10 out of 5 doctors feel it's OK to be schitzo!
+1200 bps used to seem so fast
+186,000 miles/sec: Not just a good idea, it's the LAW.
+1st rule of intelligent tinkering - save all the parts
+2 + 2 = 4 (for the time being).
+2 + 2 = 5 (for sufficiently large values of 2)
+3 out of 4 Americans make up 75% of the population.
+43% of all statistics are worthless.
+43rd Law of Computing: Anything that can go wr...
+5 schizophrenics agree!
+50 states, and I had to pick this one...
+668 - Neighbor of the Beast
+90% of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.
+<<< Tagline deleted by Natl Endowment for the Arts >>>
+==/==/==/==Police tagline==/==/==Do not cross ==/==/==/==
+From my brain, an organ with a mind of it's own.
+From the Department of Redundancy Dept.
+A BBSer's telephone bill knows no bounds...
+A Bugless Program is an Abstract Theoretical Concept.
+A Metaphor is like a Simile.
+A Smith & Wesson *ALWAYS* beats 4 Aces.
+A big enough hammer fixes anything
+A bird in the hand can be messy.
+A camel is a horse planned by committee.
+A chicken is an egg's way of producing more eggs.
+A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
+A closed mind gathers no intelligence
+A closed mouth gathers no feet.
+A committee has 6 or more legs and no brain.
+A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying it.
+A critic is a man who leaves no turn unstoned.
+A cynic smells flowers and looks for the casket.
+A day for firm decisions! Or is it?
+A day not wasted is a day wasted!
+A day without radiation is a day without sunshine.
+A day without sunshine is like night.
+A diplomat thinks twice before saying nothing.
+A dirty book is rarely dusty.
+A fool and his money are soon SYSOP.
+A fool and his money rarely get together to start with.
+A fool must now and then be right by chance.
+A friend in need is a pest indeed...
+A friend: someone who likes you even after they know you.
+A good way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.
+A half moon is better than no moon at all.
+A harp is a nude piano.
+A hunch is creativity trying to tell you something.
+A library is an arsenal of liberty.
+A life lived in fear is half a life lived.
+A little greed can get you lots of stuff.
+A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation.
+A living example of Artificial Intelligence.
+A man needs a good memory after he has lied.
+A man's best friend is his dogma.
+A man, a plan, a canal. Suez!
+A mind is a terrible thing to taste.
+A mind is a terrible thing to ugg.. I forgot..
+A neat desk is a sign of a sick mind.
+A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
+A penny saved is a Governmental oversight.
+A perversion of nature....how exciting!
+A pessimist is never disappointed.
+A phaser on stun is like a day without orange juice.
+A rolling stone gathers momentum.
+A seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago.
+A single fact can spoil a good argument.
+A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
+A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a moose.
+A waist is a terrible thing to mind.
+A yer ago I kudnt spel progremr now I are won.
+ASCII and ye shall receive.
+ASCII stupid question... get a stupid ANSI!
+Abandon all hope ye who have entered cyberspace.
+Afraid of heights? Not me, I'm afraid of widths!
+Agnodyslexic plea: 'why ME, dog?'
+Air conditioned environment - Do not open Windows.
+Alex, I'll take 'Things Only I Know' for $1000.
+All E-mail gladly received. Offensive reply ASAP.
+All I ask for is the opportunity to prove that money can't make me happy.
+All I need to know I learned from my cat.
+All I want is a warm bed, a kind word and unlimited power
+All generalizations are bad.
+All generalizations are false, including this one.
+All hope abandon, ye who enter messages here.
+All in a day's work for...'Confuse-a-Cat'!
+All in all it's just a... 'nother brick in the wall!
+All life's answers are on TV. - Bart Simpson
+All programers are optimists.
+All that glitters has a high refractive index.
+All the easy problems have been solved.
+All things are green unless they are not.
+All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?
+All words are pegs on which to hang ideas.
+All work and no play, will make you a manager.
+All you need to be a fisherman is patience and bait.
+Almost went crazy. Would have been a real short trip.
+Alone: In bad company.
+Always draw your curves, then plot the data.
+Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much.
+Always glad to share my ignorance - I've got plenty.
+Always proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
+Always remember no matter where you go, there you are.
+Alzheimers advantage: New friends every day.
+Ambition is the last refuge of the failure.
+America Good Place to Put Chinese Restaurant.
+Amusement is the happiness of those who cannot think.
+An Elephant; A Mouse built to government specifications.
+An egotist thinks he's in the groove when he's really in a rut.
+An elephant is a mouse with an operating system.
+An idle mind is worth two in the bush.
+An ounce of application is worth a ton of abstraction.
+An ounce of emotion is equal to a ton of facts.
+An oyster is a fish built like a nut.
+An ulcer is what you get mountain climbing over molehills.
+An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
+An unemployed court jester is no one's fool.
+And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
+And he disappeared in a puff of logic.
+And if one bad cluster should accidentally fail...
+And it's only ones and zeros.
+And now for something completely different...
+And now for something completely the same...
+And tomorrow will be like today, only more so.
+And, the driver compresses EVERYTHING, not just EXE & COM
+Angels can fly because they take themselves so lightly.
+Anger blows out the lamp of the mind.
+Another case of Cherry Coke down the programming hatch!
+Answers: $1 * Correct answers: $5 * Dumb looks: Free! *
+Antidisestablishmentarianism!
+Any closet is a walk-in closet if you try hard enough.
+Any fool can criticize, condemn, & complain. And most do.
+Any philosophy that can be put in a nutshell belongs there
+Any wire cut to length will be too short.
+Anything worth doing, is worth doing for a profit.
+Are we having Fahrvergn\ 1ugen yet??
+Are ya feelin' lucky, punk?!! - Harry Callahan
+Are you really American if your ethnicity has to be hyphenated?
+Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate?
+Armageddon means never having to say you're sorry.
+Artificial Intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
+As I said before, I never repeat myself.
+As a matter of fact, no, I don't have a life.
+As easy as 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716
+As long as I can remember, I've had amnesia.
+Ask not for whom the bell tolls; let the machine get it.
+Assumption is the mother of all screwups...
+Atheist = Deity Disadvantaged.
+Auntie Em: Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. -Dorothy
+B.Gates : quality software :: R.McDonald : gourmet cuisine
+BREAKFAST.COM Halted... Cereal Port Not Responding.
+Back Up My Hard Drive? I Can't Find The Reverse Switch!
+Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic
+Bad Command:(A)bort (R)etry (T)ake RAM hostage
+Bad breath is better than no breath.
+Bald: follicularly challenged.
+Barium: what you do with dead chemists.
+Beautify Texas. Put a Yankee on a bus.
+Been there, done that, got the T-shirt.
+Best file compressor around: DEL *.* (100% compression!)
+Best way to dispose of the Borg: Give them Windows 3.1.
+Better ... stronger ... faster!
+Beware of Geeks bearing gifs.
+Beware of barking dogs that bite.
+Beware of programmers carrying screwdrivers
+Bigamy : one wife too many. Monogamy : same thing
+Bill Clinton is the Lyin' King. ( Now playing nation wide )
+Bill Clinton thinks that Cheerios are donut seeds.
+Bill Clintoon: The prince of Dorkness, a caricature of a president
+Black Holes are Out of Sight
+Black holes really suck...
+Blessed are the pessimists, for they make backups!
+Blessed is the end-user who expects nothing, for ye shall not be dissapointed.
+Bliss *IS* ignorance
+Bo Knows Taglines!
+Bo Peep did it for the insurance.
+Bombs don't kill people, explosions kill people.
+Borderline psychotic with hermit-like tendencies.
+Bore: A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
+Bored? Drive the speed limit... in your garage.
+Borg spreadsheet: Locutus 1-2-3
+Borg? Where? I don't se*(#$#..NO CARRIER
+Both of his feet are firmly planted in the air.
+Boy: A noise with dirt on it.
+Brain dysfunction detected....
+Brain over - Insert coin
+Brain: The apparatus with which we think that we think.
+Break up a relationship - buy a computer!!
+Breathing may be hazardous to your health.
+Britannia waives the rules.
+Bug off, Banana Nose; Relieve mine eyes
+Bugs are Sons of Glitches!
+Bugs, like coathangers, breed if unobserved.
+Building Contractors, not to be confused with homemakers
+Bullets speak louder than reason.
+Bumper sticker on a hearse: I'd rather be breathing
+Bungee Jumper? Catch you on the rebound.
+Bureaucrats cut red tape, lengthwise
+Bus error (Passengers dumped)
+Busier than a 1 legged man in an butt-kicking contest.
+But I forgot all about the Amnesia Conference!!
+But honey, we can afford it, I sold your car!
+But my little voice TOLD me to do it!
+But soft, what light through yonder tagline breaks?
+But then again, I like cold toilet seats.
+But what if I'm a figment of my OWN imagination?
+Buy American!
+Buy Land Now. It's Not Being Made Any More.
+Buy a supscription to Playboy and send it to your boss' wife
+By all means, let's not confuse ourselves with the facts!
+C programmer run C programmer crash C programmer quit
+C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN DOS RUN
+CAUTION: RIDER MAY BAIL AT ANY TIME
+CCITT: Can't Certify I Trust Telecom.
+CCITT: Can't Conceive Intelligent Thoughts Today
+CD-WOM, Wead Onwy Memowy.
+CEO of Dementia and Other Meaningless Entities.
+CHIP: One California hi-way patrolman.
+CODING: AN addictive Drug.
+COMMAND: A suggestion made to a computer.
+CONgress (n) - Opposite of PROgress
+CRASH: Normal termination.
+CRIME CONTROL: Fire a warning shot into his HEART!
+CURIOSITY? Nah. I got THAT cat with a lawnmower.
+CYCLIC REDUNDANCY CHECK: Stocktaking at a Bike shop
+California raisins murdered: Cereal Killer suspected
+Can I yell 'movie' in a crowded firehouse?
+Can you find the mispelled word in hear?
+Can you repeat the part after 'Listen very carefully'?
+Can you see the REAL ME, can ya?!?! CAN YA??!?!!?!?!?!?!
+Can you tell me how to get to Sesame Street?
+Can't learn to do it well? Learn to enjoy doing it badly!
+Card-carrying member of the cultural elite.
+Carlsbad Caverns: 22% more cavities.
+Cause of crash: Inadvertent contact with the ground.
+Caution: Breathing may be hazardous to your health.
+Caution: Contents under pressure
+Caution: Hungry Dieter May bite if provoked
+Caveat emptor, no deposit no return, do not remove.
+Celibacy is not hereditary.
+Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.
+Chernobyl used Windows
+Chess players mate better.
+Chicago runs best on a VCR.
+Chicago, an operating system Pair-of-Dimes shift!
+Chicago... The biggest thing since New Coke!
+Chicago: NT deja vu!
+Chicago? Been there. I'm ready to travel at WARP speed!
+Chicken heads are the chief food of captive alligators.
+Chipmunks roasting on an open fire.
+Choose heaven for climate, hell for society.
+Christmas comes, but once a year is enough.
+Circular Definition: see Definition, Circular.
+City Planners do it with their eyes shut.
+Civilization - biggest syntax error in history!
+Clark Kent is a transvestite.
+Clarvoiants meeting canceled due to unforseen events.
+Clean mind, clean body: take your pick.
+Cleanliness is next to impossible.
+Climate is what you expect. Weather is what you get.
+Clinton is one Bill, George Bush can't veto...
+Clinton/Gore is to the presidency as Beavis & Butthead are to television.
+Clones are people two.
+Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades!
+Close your eyes and press escape three times.
+Closed Hearing for the Caption Impaired...
+Cogito ergo spud I think therefore I yam.
+Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage.
+Come in here, dear boy, have a cigar, you're gonna go far!
+Coming Soon!! Mouse Support for Edlin!
+Coming soon: Netware for the Nintendo!
+Commence strategic maneuvers at audible command signal. 5, 4, 3...
+Committees keep minutes and lose hours.
+Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
+Common sense isn't...
+Communism is like a mouth on a lollipop
+Competence always contains the seeds of incompetence.
+Computational Physicist and all around nice guy.
+Computer Lie #1: You'll never use all that disk space.
+Computer: a million morons working at the speed of light.
+Computers All Wait at the Same Speed!
+Computers Rule 01001111 01001011
+Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
+Computers are useless; they can only give answers.
+Computers run on faith, not electrons.
+Condense soup, not books!
+Conformity obstructs progress.
+Confucius say too much.
+Confucius say: I didn't say that!
+Confucius say: Man with no legs bums around.
+Confucius say: Those who quote me are fools.
+Confuse People: Quote from the wrong message!
+Confused? Call Counselor Troi 1-900-NCC-1701: $1.95/minute
+Confusion not only reigns, it pours.
+Consolations, Consultations, Conflagrations.
+Constant change is here to stay.
+Contentsoftaglinemaysettleduringshipping.
+Converse with any plankton lately?
+Copyright the Intergalactic Thought Association
+Corrupt REALITY.SYS: Reboot Universe (Y/n)?
+Could crop circles be the work of a cereal killer?
+Couldn't myself have better it said.
+Courage atrophies from lack of use.
+Crime does not pay...as well as politics.
+Crime doesn't pay... does that mean my job is a crime?
+Crime wouldn't pay if the government ran it.
+Crime, Sex, Alcohol, Drugs...Boy do I love Congress
+Cynicism is intellectual dandyism.
+Cynics are people who know the price of everything and the value of nothing.
+D.A.D.D. - Daddies Against Dirty Diapers
+D.A.M. - Mothers Against Dyslexia
+D.A.M.M - Drunks Against Mad Mothers
+DAM: Mothers Against Dyslexia.
+DANGER! Computer store ahead, hide wallet!
+DCE seeks DTE for mutual exchange of data.
+DEFINE: De ting you get for breaking de law.
+DEVICE=EXXON.SYS may mess up your environment
+DILATE: To live longer.
+DIODE: What happens to people who don't die young.
+DIVORCE =system('echo y| erase \wife\*.*' );
+DO NOT ADJUST YOUR MIND - the fault is with reality
+DO NOT REMOVE THIS TAGLINE (UNDER PENALTY OF LAW)!
+DOC files? We don't need NO STINKIN' DOC FILES!
+DOS 5.0 Yesterday's operating system, today!
+DOS means never having to live hand-to-mouse.
+DOS never says 'EXCELLENT command or filename, Dude!'
+DOS-O-MANIA : Reboot is not kicking your computer again
+DOS-O-MANIA : Root is not the book Alex Haley wrote.
+DOWN WITH EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!
+Daddy, what does 'Formatting Drive C:' mean?
+Dain Bramaged.
+Dang this hobby is expensive!
+Dangerous exercise: Jumping to conclusions.
+Darth Vader sleeps with a Teddywookie.
+Dawn: The time when men of reason go to bed.
+Dawson's First Law: You don't have enough outlets.
+Death benefits = oxymoron.
+Death is 99 per cent fatal to laboratory rats.
+Death is God's way of dropping carrier.
+Death is life's answer to the question 'Why?'
+Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.
+Death sneaks up on you as a windshield sneaks up on a bug.
+Death: to stop sinning suddenly.
+Deflector shields just came on, Captain.
+Delivered by Electronic Sled-Dogs.....Woof!
+Democrats Call for Amnesty, Reduced Sentences Likely.
+Depart in pieces.... i.e., Split.
+Detour: The roughest distance between two points.
+Diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
+Did I just step on someone's toes again?
+Did ya hear? They took the word gullible out of the dictionary!
+Did you expect mere proof to sway my opinion?
+Die Yuppie Scum.
+Diets are for those who are thick and tired of it.
+Difference between Jane Fonda & Bill Clinton? Jane went to Vietnam
+Digression is education.
+Dime: a dollar with all the taxes taken out.
+Dinner Not Ready...(A)bort (R)etry (P)izza
+Diplomacy is saying 'nice doggy' until you find a rock.
+Diplomacy is the ability to let someone else have your way.
+Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one's country.
+Dirty deeds - DONE DIRT CHEAP!
+Disclaimer: All opinions are not really opinions.
+Disclaimer: Written by a highly caffeinated mammal.
+Discoveries are made by not following instructions.
+Disks travel in packs.
+Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE!
+Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?
+Do I mind if you smoke? No. Do you mind if I FART?
+Do fish get thirsty?
+Do not believe in miracles -- rely on them.
+Do not disturb. Already disturbed!
+Do not put statements in the negative form.
+Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
+Do steam rollers really roll steam?
+Do the joke. Get the laugh. Move on.
+Do unto others BEFORE they do unto you!
+Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
+Do you know the way to San Jose?
+Doctor Who for president
+Doctor, my brain hurts!
+Documentation is the castor oil of programming.
+Does Bill Clinton think Elvis is alive?
+Does killing time damage eternity?
+Does the Enterprise use DOS v2356.0?
+Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
+Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?
+Dogs come when you call. Cats have answering machines.
+Dogs crawl under Gates, software under Windows.
+Don't Take Life Seriously, It Is Not Permanent.
+Don't ask me, I have intermittent memory loss
+Don't ask me, I only work here.
+Don't ask me, I'm making this up as I go!
+Don't be a sexist, broads hate that.
+Don't be afraid to drive a nail in the wood!
+Don't believe everything you hear or anything you say.
+Don't blame me, I voted for Mickey Mouse.
+Don't buy furs, it takes trees to make protest signs.
+Don't byte off more than you can multiplex.
+Don't confuse me with facts, my mind's already made up!
+Don't crush that dwarf, hand me the pliers.
+Don't diet, download a virus to remove the FAT.
+Don't do what I SAY, do what I mean!
+Don't get stuck in a closet -- wear yourself out.
+Don't just do something !!! Stand there !!!
+Don't let school interfere with your education.
+Don't look at me in that tone of voice!
+Don't look back, the lemmings are gaining on you.
+Don't mess with Murphy.
+Don't panic. Don't panic. Don't panic. ... ALL RIGHT, NOW PANIC
+Don't play stupid with me! I'm better at it.
+Don't press the keys so hard!
+Don't read everything you believe.
+Don't rush me. I get paid by the hour.
+Don't speak now, and forever hold your peace.
+Don't start with me. You know how I get.
+Don't steal. The government hates competition.
+Don't stop posting, a good laugh breaks up my day nicely
+Don't sweat it -- it's only ones and zeros.
+Don't talk unless you can improve the silence.
+Don't thank me for insulting you. It was my pleasure...
+Don't try to saw sawdust.
+Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
+Don't use no double negatives.
+Don't worry, I'm fluent in weirdo.
+Down with categorical imperative!
+Down with ignurance!
+Downgrade your system for only 89 dollars! Install Windows!
+Dragons love you. You're crunchy and good with ketchup.
+Drama is life with the dull bits cut out.
+Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing
+Drilling for oil is boring.
+Drink wet cement, and get completely stoned.
+Drive A: format failure, formatting C: instead...
+Drive C: Error, (A)bort (R)etry (I)gnore (K)ick (S)cream
+Dropped from my peeling lips like lousy fruit.
+Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system.
+Dumb luck beats sound planning every time. Trust me.
+Dying is no excuse. Nixon in 96.
+Dyslexics are persona au gratin.
+Dyslexics have more fnu.
+Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE!
+EMS: Enhanced Money Scam
+ERROR 103: Dead mouse in hard drive.
+EXPANSION SLOTS: The extra holes in your belt buckle.
+Eagles may soar but weasels aren't sucked into jet engines!
+Easter is canceled this year. They've found the body.
+Eat Healthy, Exercise, and Die Anyway ...
+Eat the rich, the poor are tough and stringy
+Efficiency takes time! Frugality: who can afford it?
+Eggheads unite! You have nothing to lose but your yolks.
+Ego Gratification through Violence
+Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
+Email me the rules, please!
+Energizer Bunny Arrested! Charged with battery.
+Enjoy me, I may never pass this way again.
+Enough research will tend to support your theory.
+Ensign Pillsbury: He's bread Jim!
+Enter that again, just a little slower.
+Error 15 - Unable to exit Windows. Try the door.
+Eschew obfuscation!
+Even in this corner of the galaxy, Captain, 2+2=4 ... Spock
+Even snakes are afraid of snakes.
+Even the greatest of whales is helpless in the middle of the desert
+Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I...
+Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
+Ever wonder why Oprah spelled backwards is Harpo?
+Every man's work is a portrait of himself.
+Every purchase has its price.
+Every why hath a wherefore.
+Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.
+Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.
+Everyone has photographic memory...some don't have film!
+Everyone hates me because I'm paranoid
+Everyone is entitled to my opinion.
+Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.
+Everyone's expendable...and no one has a real friend
+Everything bows to success, even grammar.
+Everything in our favor was against us.
+Everything that is not mandatory is forbidden.
+Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.
+Evil always triumphs over good, because good is STUPID!
+Exceeding the legal fun limit on a regular basis
+Excellent time to become a missing person.
+Excuse me while I dance a little jig of despair
+Excuse me while I sharpen my tongue.
+Experience is a good teacher but her fees are high...
+Experience: a name everyone gives to his mistakes.
+Exploding piglets!!! My gosh, it's raining bacon!
+Exxon Suxx.
+F.A.R.T....Fathers Against Radical Teenagers
+FATAL SYSTEM ERROR: Press F13 to continue...
+FIGHT BACK! Fill out your tax forms with Roman numerals.
+FILE COPIED. I THINK?
+FLOPPY DISK: Serious curvature of the spine.
+FOR SALE: 1 set of morals, never used, will sell cheap.
+FORD: The Heartbreak of today's Chevrolet!
+Fact is solidified opinion
+Facts Just Get In The Way And Impede Progress.
+Facts are stubborn things.
+Fad: In one era and out the other
+Familiarity breeds attempt
+Familiarity breeds children.
+Famous last words - Don't worry, I can handle it.
+Famous last words - Icarus: Aaaahhhhhhhhh.
+Famous last words - You and what army?
+Faster than a speeding ticket!
+Fat Wars: May the Sauce Be With You.
+Fat person: Nutritional Overachiever
+Fatal Error Using Mouse. Replace and Bury Operator.
+Features should be discovered, not documented.
+Feel lucky???? Update your software!
+Felines... nothing more than felines...
+Fer sell cheep: IBM spel chekker. Wurks grate.
+Fife. n. Small shrill instrument that rhymes with wife.
+Figures won't lie, but liars will figure.
+File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
+Find your aim in life, before you run out of ammunition
+First thing you do is shoot all the lawyers
+Fish and visitors stink in three days.
+Flames to /dev/null/here/is/a/quarter/now/go/buy/a/clue.
+Flaming nuclear death to Smurfs
+Flirt: A woman who thinks it's every man for herself.
+Floggings will continue until morale improves.
+Flying saucers are real, the Air Force doesn't exist.
+Folks who think they know it all bug those of us who do
+Follow-ups to alt.nobody.really.cares
+Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
+Fools rush in where Fools have been before!
+Fools rush in wherever lottery tickets are sold
+For Sale: Slightly used message. Enquire within.
+For at the end of history lies the undiscovered country.
+For discussion only. Not to be relied upon.
+For every vision there is an equal and opposite revision.
+For people who like peace and quiet: A phoneless cord!
+For sale, Toilet-seat cover. Barely used.
+For the finest in brain candy.
+Forget the Joneses...I can't keep up with the SIMPSONS!
+Forget the computer! Where's my abacus??
+Forget the diet center; send yourself a candygram.
+Forgive your enemies...but REMEMBER THEIR NAMES!
+Four minus two is one and the same.
+Fraud(n): A telephone number starting with '1-900'
+Free Nelson Mandela, while stocks last!
+Free advice is worth what you pay for it
+Free your mind ... the rest will follow!
+Freedom is just chaos with better lighting.
+Friction can be a drag sometimes.
+Friendly fire - ISN'T !
+Friends are Friends, regardless of their baud rate!
+Friends come and go, enemies accumulate.
+Friends don't let friends drive naked.
+Friends encourage friends to use Windows - under Linux!
+Friendship is one soul in two bodies.
+Frost
+Funny, only sensible people agree with me.
+GURU: One who knows more jargon than you.
+Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.
+Gargle twice daily - see if your neck leaks.
+Geez if you belive in honkus.
+Genealogy = A DNA square-dance in the Thighlight Zone
+General Failure reading John Dvorak
+General stupidity error reading drive C:
+Geoff, Brett and Todd...the BO-DYNASTY!!!
+George Orwell was an optimist.
+Get behind early so you have plenty of time to catch up.
+Get the facts first - you can distort them later!
+Get your filthy hands off my dessert!
+Gimme back my face! You're getting it ugly.
+Give a woman an inch and she'll park a car in it.
+Give a woman an inch and she thinks she's a ruler.
+Give your child mental blocks for Christmas.
+Go Lemmings, Go!!!
+Go shopping. Buy Stuff. Sweat in it. Return it the next day.
+God created cats so that men could learn to understand women
+God does not play dice.
+God heals and the doctor takes the fee.
+Going out of my mind, back in 5 minutes.
+Going the speed of light is bad for your age.
+Good day to let down old friends who need help.
+Good girls go to heaven...but bad girls go EVERYWHERE!!
+Goodness has NOTHING to do with it.....
+Gotta love me!
+Grab your helmet, get your bike, it's SHOWTIME!
+Graduate Of The Uncle Fester & Keith Moon School of hair styling
+Gravity brings me down
+Gravity doesn't exist. The Earth sucks.
+Great minds travel in the same sewers.
+Greed is good! Greed is right! Greed works!
+Grow your own dope... plant a man
+Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional!!
+Grub first, then ethics.
+Gun control is being able to hit your target!
+Guns don't kill people... death does.
+Guns don't kill people..., I kill people!
+H lp! S m b d st l ll th v w ls fr m m k yb rd!
+HAL 9000: Dave. Put down those Windows disks, Dave. DAVE!
+Hackito ergo sum.
+Hailing frequencies open, Captain.
+Hand me that crowbar... I must pry out this bullet.
+Happiness is Earth in your rear view mirror.
+Happiness is a warm gun.
+Happiness is a warm modem
+Happiness is finding special characters \ 1\ 2\ 1\ 2
+Happiness is not a destination. It's the trip.
+Happiness is seeing your mother-in-law's face on the back of a milk carton.
+Happiness is...receiving YOUR posts!!!!
+Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
+Hard work must have killed someone!
+Has it ever rained cats and dogs?
+Hasta la vista, Baby!
+Have Tardis, will travel.
+Have an adequate day.
+Have cursor, will curse.
+Have it OUR way. Yours is IRRELEVANT. At BORGerKing.
+Have you ever talked into an acoustic modem?
+Have you seen Quasimoto? I have a hunch he's back!
+Having Windows problems? Dial 1-800-3-IBM-OS2 for fast relief!
+Having two bathrooms ruins the capacity to co-operate.
+He does the work of 3 Men...Moe, Larry & Curly
+He has Van Gogh's ear for music.
+He who Laughs, Lasts.
+He who always plows a straight furrow is in a rut.
+He who asks timidly makes denial easy.
+He who dies with the most access, wins.
+He who dies with the most toys... is *still* DEAD!
+He who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.
+He who hesitates is constipated.
+He who laughs last is S-L-O-W.
+He who laughs last probably made a backup.
+He who lives by the sword laughs last.
+He who places head in sand, will get kicked in the end!
+He who shouts the loudest has the floor.
+He who sitteth on an upturned tack shall surely rise.
+He's dead Jim. Grab his tricorder. I'll get his wallet.
+He's dim, Jed
+He's not dead, Jim, he's just metabolically challenged.
+Heads I win... DITTO tails
+Health food makes me sick.
+Heisenberg slept here, I think.
+Help endangered species - adopt a KGB operative.
+Help fight continental drift.
+Help stamp out mental illness, or I'll kill you!
+Help stamp out, eliminate and abolish redundancy!
+Help! I'm lost somewhere in the Generation Gap.
+Help! I've been stuck in here for years and years...
+Help! Police! That guy stole my .sig! STOP!!! THIEF!!!
+Help!!! I'm falling and I can't click out!!!
+Help, I'm slipping into the Twilight Zone!
+Here today, gaunt tomorrow.
+Hey! Hacker! Leave those lists alone!
+Hey! This is a morgue, not an amusement park!
+Hey! Who took the cork off my lunch??!
+Hey, CServe/Unisys! Stick it where the sun don't shine!
+Hey, Worf...I hooked Data up to a Modem...Wanna see?
+Hi! I can't remember your name either.
+Hi, I'm from Corporate. I'm here to help you.
+Hi. I'll be your tagline for this evening.
+High message: 9434567. Message last read: 9.
+Hills weed out the weak. Darwin would argue this is good.
+Hindsight is always 20:20.
+Hindsight is an exact science.
+Hm..what's this red button fo:=/07<NO CARRIER
+Hmm...Nice tagline. <SWIPE!> SUCKER!!! AH, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
+Hollow chocolate has no calories
+Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom.
+Honey, PLEASE don't pick up the PH$@#*&$^(#@&$^%(*NO CARRIER
+Honeymoon Salad: Lettuce alone, with no dressing.
+Honeymoon: time between 'I do' and 'you'd better'
+Honk if you love cheeses.
+Honk if you love peace and quiet.
+Honk, if you have slept with Clinton.
+Hors d'oeuvres--a ham sandwich cut into forty pieces.
+Housework done properly, can kill you
+Houston! do you read.
+How come the AT&T logo looks like the Death Star?
+How come there's only one Monopolies Commission?
+How come wrong numbers are never busy?
+How do I set my laser printer for stun?
+How do you know it's summer in Seattle? Rain's warm!
+How do you make Windows faster ? Throw it harder
+How do you pronounce my name? With reverence.
+How do you write zero in Roman numerals?
+How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? From a catalog!
+How does one expect the unexpected?
+How long is a short story?
+How long will a floating point operation float?
+How many consultants will fit onto the head of a pin?
+How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise MY hand!
+How many weeks are there in a light year?
+How much can I get away with and still go to heaven?
+How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
+Humpty dumpty was pushed.
+Hydrate or Die.
+Hypochondria is the only disease I haven't got.
+I *LOVE* it when a plan comes together!
+I BBS because no one can read my handwriting.
+I Cayman went.
+I Have To Stop Now, My Fingers Are Getting Hoarse!
+I M a tru beleever in hour edukashun sistum.
+I Still miss my ex-wife.....BUT, My aim is improving!
+I Think....therefore I'm OVER QUALIFIED!!!!!!!!!
+I love it when a plan comes together!
+I admit it's offbeat, but lets not get hysterical.
+I always lie. In fact, I'm lying to you right now!
+I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
+I am Clinton of Borg. Your income will be assimilated.
+I am Homer of Borg! Prepare to be...OOooooo! Donuts!!!
+I am Lancelot of Borg. Resistance is feudal.
+I am both of us & so are you.
+I am built for comfort, not speed!
+I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
+I am functioning within established parameters.
+I am in total control, but don't tell my wife.
+I am not an animal! I am ... well, not an animal.
+I am serious. And don't call me Shirley.
+I am sweet and lovable at all times.
+I am the girl-next-door's imaginary boyfriend.
+I am what I am and that's all that I am.
+I am. Therefore, I think. I think.
+I apologize to the deaf for the loss of subtitles.
+I bet you I could stop gambling.
+I bought a cordless extension cord.
+I came, I saw, I did a little shopping.
+I came, I saw, I took LOTS of PICTURES!
+I came... I saw... I stole your tagline.
+I can do without essentials but I must have my luxuries
+I can quit anytime I want; I just don't want to!
+I can resist anything but temptation.
+I can tell you are lying. Your lips are moving.
+I can walk on water, but I stagger on alcohol.
+I can't be overdrawn, I still have checks left!
+I can't believe my computer's on fire.
+I can't hear you. There's a banana republic in my ear.
+I cna ytpe 300 wrods pre mniuet!!!
+I could be arguing in my spare time.
+I could have stuck with DOS, but NO.
+I couldn't care less about apathy.
+I didn't cheat, I just changed the Rules!
+I didn't know it was impossible when I did it.
+I distinctly remember forgetting that.
+I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.
+I do this kind of stuff to him all through the picture.
+I don't care if I'm apathetic.
+I don't care who you are, Fatso. Get the reindeer off my roof!
+I don't care who you are, what you are driving, or where you would rather be.
+I don't eat snails... I prefer FAST food!
+I don't hate Windows - it runs great under Linux!
+I don't have a solution but I admire the problem.
+I don't lie, cheat or steal unnecessarily.
+I don't need a disclaimer. I OWN the company.
+I don't think, therefore I am not.
+I don't want the world, I just want your half.
+I drink to make other people interesting.
+I eat Swiss cheese from the inside out.
+I feel like a fugitive from the law of averages.
+I feel so inar-inar-inar tic-u-late
+I feel the need......the need for speed!
+I finally washed the mud off of mud.
+I find myself beside a stream of empty thought
+I float like an anchor and sting like a moth.
+I get mail........ I exist.
+I give advice worth the price....free!
+I got arrested in LA and boy am I beat!
+I guess a cynic smells different.
+I had a life once... now I have a computer and a modem.
+I had amnesia once or twice.
+I had my coat hangers spayed.
+I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.
+I hate to repeat gossip, so I'll only say this once.
+I have a 9600bps modem and 1.5bps fingers
+I have a rock garden. 3 of them died last week.
+I have a speech impediment... my foot.
+I have already not made that point
+I have seen the evidence. I want DIFFERENT evidence!
+I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
+I have the mars observer and I'm not returning it until I get an 'A' in astronomy
+I haven't lost my mind -- it's backed up on tape somewhere.
+I haven't lost my mind, I know exactly where I left it.
+I hear what you're saying but I just don't care.
+I is a college student.
+I is knot dain bramaged!
+I just bought a cured ham. Wonder what it had?
+I keep my .BAT files in D:\BELFRY
+I know Karate, Kung Fu, and 47 other dangerous words
+I know everything about everything, except that.
+I know it all. I just can't remember it all at once.
+I like candy, especially the gooey kind with nougat!
+I like kids, but I don't think I could eat a whole one.
+I like to leave messages *before* the beep.
+I like to reminisce with people I don't know.
+I like to think of myself as a divide overflow.
+I like your approach, now let's see your departure.
+I lost a button hole today.
+I lost my knickers at Niagara.
+I made it foolproof. They are making better fools!
+I may be fat but you're ugly, and I can lose weight.
+I may be getting older, but I refuse to grow up
+I may not always be perfect, but I'm always me.
+I may not be perfect, but parts of me are excellent.
+I mustanottagottalotta sleep last night.
+I need someone really bad. Are you really bad?
+I never deny, I never contradict. I sometimes forget.
+I never met a chocolate I didn't like!
+I only counted 100 dalmatians...!!!
+I owe, I owe, it's off to work I go.
+I parked my hard disk and now I can't find it!
+I planted some bird seed. A bird came up.
+I post.......... I am
+I promise results, not promises.
+I refuse a battle of wits with an unarmed person!
+I remember when Saturns were rockets, not cars.
+I saw, I came, I cleaned it up.
+I smashed a Window and saw... Linux!
+I spilled spot remover on my dog, and now he's gone.
+I think I strained a muscle I didn't know I had!
+I think, therefore I am. I think.
+I think. Therefore I am DANGEROUS.
+I thought I was wrong but I was mistaken.
+I tried being reasonable once. I didn't like it.
+I tried switching to gum but I couldn't keep it lit.
+I tried to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.
+I tried to drown my problems but they can swim!
+I try to make everyone's day a little more surreal.
+I used to be disgusted, but now I'm just amused.
+I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.
+I used to be schizophrenic, but we're all right now.
+I used to have a handle on life, then it broke.
+I used to spell badlie, but now I got worser.
+I used to watch TV, then I bought a modem.
+I wake near the end of the day.
+I want .50 cal machine guns as a factory option.
+I warn you not to underestimate my powers.
+I was arrested for selling illegal sized paper.
+I was arrested for walking in someone else's sleep.
+I was going to procrastinate, but I put it off....
+I went on a 30-day diet - and lost 30 days!
+I will defend to your death my right to my opinion.
+I wish life had a scroll-back buffer.
+I wouldn't touch the Metric System with a 3.048m pole!
+I wrote a few children's books, but not on purpose.
+I xeroxed my watch. Now I have time to spare.
+I'd give my left arm to be ambidextrous
+I'd like to live like a poor person with lots of money.
+I'd like to, but last time I went I never came back..
+I'd love to, but I have to fulfill my potential.
+I'd love to, but I have to rotate my crops.
+I'd love to, but I have to stay home and see if I snore
+I'd love to, but I prefer to remain an enigma.
+I'd love to, but I think you want the OTHER Phillip.
+I'd love to, but I'm trying to be less popular.
+I'd love to, but I've dedicated my life to linguini.
+I'd love to, but my crayons all melted together.
+I'd love to, but my favorite commercial is on TV.
+I'd love to, but my patent is pending.
+I'd love to, but none of my socks match.
+I'd love to, but there's a disturbance in the Force.
+I'd love to, but you know how we psychos are.
+I'd rather be bicycling!
+I'll eat anything that's BRIGHT BLUE!!
+I'll get you my pretty, and your little dog too!
+I'll get you yet, you kwazy wabbit!
+I'll jump off that bridge when I come to it.
+I'll tell you what's the matter! This parrot is dead!
+I'm Not Schizophrenic, And Neither Am I.
+I'm Serfectly Pober.
+I'm a Bum...a BEACH Bum!
+I'm a cowboy ... on a steel horse I ride!
+I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay!
+I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I'm perfect.
+I'm an Debian developer...I don't NEED a life!
+I'm an absolute, off-the-wall fanatical moderate.
+I'm an incorrigible punster, so don't corrige me!
+I'm an influential person, gravitationally speaking.
+I'm as bored as a pacifist's pistol.
+I'm at the corner of Walk and Don't Walk.
+I'm dangerous when I know what I'm doing.
+I'm easy to please as long as I get my way.
+I'm fallin' down a spiral, destination unknown!
+I'm fascinated by the way memory diffuses fact.
+I'm in shape ... Rounds a shape isn't it?
+I'm leaving my body to science fiction.
+I'm moving to Mars next week, so if you have any boxes.
+I'm new and what's all this then?
+I'm no stranger, just a friend you haven't met...
+I'm not a complete idiot - several parts are missing.
+I'm not as dumb as you look.
+I'm not broke, I'm just badly bent.
+I'm not dead. I'm electroencephelographically challenged.
+I'm not even going to ignore that.
+I'm not fat just horizontally disproportionate.
+I'm not loafing. I work so fast I'm always finished
+I'm not lost, I'm 'locationally challenged.'
+I'm not nearly as think as you confused I am.
+I'm not opinionated, I'm just always right!
+I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this?
+I'm not real smart, but I can lift heavy things.
+I'm not rude, I'm 'attitudinally challenged'.
+I'm not schizophrenic. It's this guy beside me!
+I'm not tense, just terribly alert.
+I'm on the crest of a slump.
+I'm out of sick days, so I'm calling in dead!
+I'm pink, therefore I'm Spam.
+I'm schizophrenic, What are you?
+I'm so broke, I can't even pay attention.
+I'm spending a year dead for tax purposes.
+I'm sure it's clearly explained in the Zmodem DOC's
+I'm sure it's in the manual somewhere...
+I'm the person your mother warned you about.
+I'm too smart to let my intelligence go to my head.
+I'm turning you in to the SPCA!
+I've been seduced by the chocolate side of the force.
+I've got Parkinson's disease. And he's got mine.
+I've got a mind like a.. a.. what's that thing called?
+I've got to sit down and work out where I stand.
+I've had fun before. This isn't it.
+I've run out of sick leave so I'm calling in dead.
+I've seen the future. I can't afford it.
+IBM: I've Been Misled
+IBM: It may be slow, but at least it's expensive.
+IBM: you can buy better, but you can't pay more
+IF numcooks > .maxcooks THEN;SET V broth = 'spoiled';END
+INTERLACE: To tie two boots together.
+Ideas are not responsible for their followers!
+If At First You Don't Succeed Ignore The Docs...
+If Clinton's the answer, it must have been a really stupid question.
+If I can't fix it, it's probably dead.
+If I can't win, I don't wanna play!
+If I had anything witty to say, I wouldn't put it here.
+If I had been using Windoze, I'd still be writing this.
+If I save the whales, where do I keep them?
+If I save time, when do I get it back ?
+If I want your stupid opinion, I'll beat it out of you.
+If I were here more often, I wouldn't be gone so much.
+If I were two faced, would I wear this one?
+If I were you, who'd be me?
+If Murphy's Law can go wrong, it will.
+If The Shoe Fits - The Sock Fits !
+If a fly has no wings would you call him a walk?
+If a tree falls on a florist, would he make a sound?
+If all goes well, you've overlooked something!
+If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail
+If at first we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.
+If at first you don't succeed, call it v1.0!
+If at first you don't succeed, hide your astonishment.
+If at first you don't succeed, put it out for beta test.
+If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
+If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.
+If at first you don't succeed, work for Microsoft.
+If at first you don't succeed, you must be using Windows.
+If brains were dynamite you couldn't blow your nose!
+If cows could fly, everyone would carry an umbrella.
+If evolution is outlawed, only outlaws will evolve.
+If idiots could fly, this would be an airport.
+If in doubt, make it sound convincing.
+If it glows don't touch it!
+If it has feelings, its not cooked enough!
+If it isn't broken, don't fix it.
+If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing
+If it walks out of your refrigerator, LET IT GO !!
+If it works, tear it apart and find out why!
+If it's not broke, let me take a crack at it.
+If it's not going to plan, maybe there never was a plan.
+If it's not on fire, it's a software problem.
+If it's not worth doing well, it's not worth doing.
+If it's stupid and works, then it ain't stupid
+If it's too loud, you're too old.
+If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
+If little else, the brain is an educational toy.
+If marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws.
+If money could talk, it would say goodbye.
+If nobody measures up, check your yardstick.
+If rabbits feet are so lucky, what happened to the rabbit?
+If speed scares you, try Windows...
+If the shoe fits, put it in your mouth.
+If there are epigrams, there must be meta-epigrams.
+If there's one thing I can't stand, it's intolerance.
+If this were an actual tagline, it would be funny.
+If truth is stranger than fiction, you must be truth!
+If voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal.
+If winning isn't important then why keep score?
+If you associate with the wise, you will become wise.
+If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
+If you can't run with the big dogs, stay on the porch.
+If you cannot convince them, confuse them.
+If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
+If you didn't get caught, did you really do it?
+If you don't care where you are, then you ain't lost.
+If you don't like my opinion of you - improve yourself!
+If you don't like the news, go out and make some of your own.
+If you have nothing to do, don't do it here.
+If you have to ask what jazz is, you'll never know.
+If you hear an onion ring please answer it.
+If you mess with something long enough it'll break.
+If you must drink and drive, drive a Yugo!
+If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
+If you say nothing, no one will repeat it.
+If you see an onion ring, ANSWER IT!
+If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.
+If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
+If you want your name spelt wrong, die.
+If you wish work poorly done, pay in advance.
+If you're not confused, you're not paying attention.
+If you're not the solution, you're the precipitate.
+If your attack is going well, then it's an ambush..
+If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it!
+Ifyoucanreadthis,youspendtoomuchtimefiguringouttaglines!
+Ignorance is temporary; stupid is forever.
+Illiterate? Write for free help.
+Imagery is All In The Mind.
+Imagination is the only weapon in the war against reality
+Impropriety is the soul of wit.
+In God we trust, all others pay cash.
+In a fight between you and the world, back the world.
+In case of emergency, break glass. Scream. Bleed to death
+In case of fire, yell 'FIRE!'
+In politics stupidity is not a handicap.
+In the land of the witless, the halfwit is king.
+In war there is no substitute for victory.
+Include this in your CONFIG.SYS File: BUGS=OFF
+Incompetence plus incompetence equals incompetence.
+Individualists of the world, UNITE!
+Inertia makes the world go round.
+Inferiority complex: conviction by a jury of your fears.
+Innovate or Die.
+Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.
+Insanity is just a state of mind.
+Insert New Disk for Drive C: Press ENTER when ready.
+Insert inevitable trivial witticism of your choice.
+Interchangeable parts won't.
+Internal combustion engines are the dinosaurs' revenge
+International Brotherhood of Tagline Thieves.
+Interstellar Matter is a Gas
+Invisible Systems, Inc. If you don't see it, we made it.
+Iron Law of Distribution: Them that has, gets.
+Is 'tired old cliche' one?
+Is it OK to yell 'MOVIE' in a crowded firehouse?
+Is it in my head...or in my heart?
+Is it ok to use my AM radio after NOON?
+Is it possible to feel gruntled?
+Is that a flying saucer or a pie in the sky?
+Is there life before coffee?
+Is this a machine? I don't talk to machines! [Click]
+Is this the right room for an argument?
+It all looks the same if you're not the lead dog.
+It can't be full...I STILL HAVE SUBDIRECTORIES!
+It compiled, first screen came up?? Ship it! --Bill Gates
+It did what? Well, it's not supposed to do that.
+It doesn't work, but it looks pretty.
+It has many other uses as well. Allow me. - Worf
+It is always better to sacrifice your opponent's men
+It is bad luck to be superstitious.
+It is better to be brief than boring.
+It is better to wear out than to rust out.
+It is broke. It will not work. It does not go.
+It is fatal to live too long.
+It is incumbent on us to avoid archaisms.
+It is morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money.
+It is much easier to be critical than to be correct
+It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail.
+It is, after all, only a moment in the infinity of time.
+It really bothers me when people cut me o...
+It said 'Insert disk #3', but only two will fit!
+It works better if you plug it in.
+It's 10:00 PM...do YOU know where YOUR tagline is?
+It's Ensign Flintstone - he's Fred, Jim.
+It's a Tough Job! ..... So I'd Rather YOU do it.
+It's a fine line between fishing & standing still
+It's a fine night to have an evening.
+It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
+It's a tough job! ..... So I'd Rather YOU do it.
+It's an ill wind that gathers no moss.
+It's as bad as you think and they are out to get you.
+It's bad luck to be superstitious.
+It's been a business doing pleasure with you.
+It's been lovely, but I have to scream now.
+It's best to leave quickly when you make noises like that...
+It's better to burn out than to fade away.
+It's clever, but is it art?
+It's de\ 2ja\ 5 vu all over again.
+It's easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
+It's easier to obtain forgiveness than permission.
+It's easy to apply yourself, just use crazy glue!
+It's easy to be brave from a safe distance.
+It's hard to RTFM when you can't find the FM..
+It's hard to be serious when you're naked.
+It's life Jim, but not as we know it.
+It's like Deja Vu all over again...
+It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
+It's more than a reader. It's a message base manager!
+It's never too late to have a happy childhood
+It's not easy having an overbearing parent! - Troi
+It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere!
+It's not in the manual!
+It's not just a hobby, it's an obsession!
+It's not pretty being easy.
+It's not the bullet that kills you, it's the hole.
+It's not the money I want, it's the stuff.
+It's not the principle of the thing, it's the money
+It's okay to be ugly...but aren't you overdoing it?
+It's only a hobby ... only a hobby ... only a hobby ... only
+It's only ones and zeros.
+It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is...dead, Jim.
+It's smart to pick your friends, but not your nose.
+It's starting to rain, .SQZ the animals into the .ARC !
+It's true, forgiveness IS easier to get than permission
+Its a JOKE, like the funny kind but different.
+Itsdifficulttobeverycreativewithonlyfiftysevencharacters!
+JFK: I need this motorcade like a hole in my head!
+James Bond rules. 00K.
+Jealousy is all the fun you think they have.
+Jet Engine Theory -Suck, Squeeze, Bang, Blow!
+Join the Group Mind - become a Borg
+Joseph Stalin's grave was a Communist Plot.
+Jumbo shrimp = oxymoron.
+Junk: stuff we throw away. Stuff: junk we keep.
+Just because you're STUPID ain't no excuse.
+Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get me!
+Just do it.
+Just don't tell the asylum you saw me here
+Just how much leg have I got
+Just my 78,000 lira worth.
+Just what part of 'NO' didn't you understand...?
+Just when you think you've won the rat race along come faster rats.
+Justice is incidental to law and order.
+Justice: A decision in your favor.
+Kamikaze Pilot Wanted: Experienced only need apply.
+Keep America beautiful.. properly dispose of your lawyer.
+Keep a clear head and always carry a lightbulb.
+Keep emotionally active. Cater to your favorite neurosis.
+Keyboard Not Found - Press [F1] to Continue
+Kicked wide of the goal with such precision.
+Kids-They're not sleeping, they're recharging!
+Kill them all! .... Let God sort them out.
+Killer Rabbit's Motto: 'Lettuce Prey.'
+Kilroy occupied these coordinates.
+Kleptomania: take something for it
+Know what I hate? I hate rhetorical questions!
+Knowing Murphy's Law won't help either.
+LISP: To call a spade a thpade.
+LISTEN HERE! I HAVE FIRST AMENDENT RIGH(@#$!9*&^ NO CARRIER
+LOTUS - Let Only The Users Suffer
+Laddie, ya think ya might like ta ... rephrase that?
+Land of the Single Entendre...
+Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle.
+Laugh and the world thinks you're an idiot.
+Laughter: The shortest distance between two people.
+Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.
+Lesser artists borrow. Great artists steal.
+Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it!
+Let's organize this thing and take all the fun out of it.
+Let's split up, we can do more damage that way.
+Liberal - a power worshiper without power.
+Libraries: There are no answers, only cross references.
+Life - brief interlude between nothingness and eternity.
+Life can be great if you live it to the fullest!
+Life is a sandwich, and it's always lunchtime
+Life is a series of very rude awakenings.
+Life is like a Car-wash and I'm on a bicycle.
+Life is only as long as you live it.
+Life is serious, but ART is fun!
+Life is tough. It's tougher when you're stupid.
+Life is uncertain...eat dessert first!
+Life sucks, but Death swallows!
+Life would be easier if I had the source code.
+Life's too short to dance with ugly men.
+Life's too short to dance with ugly women.
+Life, loathe it or ignore it, you can't like it.
+Likelihoods, however, are 90% against you.
+Likes and dislikes are among my favorites
+Linux, the choice of a GNU generation.
+Liposuction will destroy your FAT
+Lisp programmers have to stop and collect garbage.
+Live before you die.
+Living poor is best left to those with no money.
+Locked coathanger in car. Good thing I had a key.
+Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.
+Love is blind, marriage is the eye-opener.
+Luxuriantly hand-crafted from only the finest ASCII.
+M.A.D.D.: Midgets Against Desk Drawers.
+MOPAR = Move Over Plymouth Approaching Rapidly!
+MS Windows -- From the people who brought you EDLIN!
+MS-DOS: celebrating ten years of obsolescence
+Macho does not prove Mucho.
+Madness takes its toll; please have exact change.
+Make Headlines..use a corduroy pillow....
+Make it as simple as possible, but no simpler.
+Make it do ... Or do without.
+Make like a Tom and Cruise.
+Make like a baby and head out.
+Make like a banana and split.
+Make like a drum and beat it!
+Make like a tree and leave.
+Make somebody happy. Mind your own business.
+Make up a language and ask people for directions.
+Man has his will. Woman has her won't!
+Man invented language to satisfy his need to complain.
+Man who get hit by car, get that run down feeling
+Man who jumps through screen door likely to strain himself
+Man who put head on railroad track get splitting headache
+Man who run behind car get exhausted.
+Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss balloon
+Marching to a different kettle of fish.
+Mary had a little RAM -- only about a MEG or so.
+Math is the language God used to write the universe.
+May I please be excused? My Brain is full.
+May the Porsche be with you.
+May you live in interesting times.
+May your life be filled with experiences.
+Me know gammar. Me cood use it gud.
+Mediocrity requires aloofness to preserve it's dignity
+Meditation is not what you Think.
+Meet the new Boss--same as the old Boss...
+Megabyte: A nine course dinner.
+Member: International Brotherhood of Tagline Thieves!
+Memory is a thing we forget with.
+Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.
+Mercifully free of the ravages of intelligence
+Microfiche: Sardines.
+Microsoft Windows... a virus with mouse support.
+Microsoft gives you Windows... Linux gives you the whole house.
+Migratory lifeform with a tropism for parties
+Minds are like parachutes, they only work when open.
+Misfortune: The kind of fortune that never misses.
+Misspelled? Impossible. My modem is error correcting!
+Mistakes are often the stepping stones to utter failure.
+Modem: What landscapers do to dem lawns.
+Money is the root of all wealth.
+Monogamy leaves a lot to be desired.
+Monopoly? No, we just don't want competition.
+Most of us have been at work for several hours now.
+Mother is the invention of necessity.
+Multitasking = 3 PCs and a chair with wheels!
+Multitasking causes schizophrenia..
+Murphy is out there... waiting...
+Murphy was an optimist.
+Murphy's law needs to be repealed.
+Must Go - My Rotweiler needs its teeth sharpened.
+My *taglines* are original. *I* am a copy.
+My RAM's not what it used to be, so don't quote me.
+My attention isn't hard to get. It IS hard to keep...
+My best friend is a social worker.
+My computer has a terminal illness
+My computer's sick, I think my modem's a carrier
+My couch potato routine honed to perfection
+My fallacies are more logical than your fallacies.
+My foolish parents taught me to read and write.
+My hat covers my head... Just like hair used to!
+My haystack had no needle!
+My head is sore, and there's a hole in the brick wall!
+My inferiority complexes aren't as good as yours.
+My karma ran over your dogma.
+My life may be strange, but at least it's not boring
+My message above. Your response here ____________.
+My other computer is a Cray Y/MP-4!
+My other computer is a HAL 9000.
+My other computer is an abacus.
+My other vehicle is a Galaxy Class Starship ...
+My reality check just bounced.
+My tagline can beat up your tagline!
+My weight is perfect for my height... which varies.
+NAVY: Never Again Volunteer Yourself
+NETWORK: What fishermen do when not fishing.
+NEWS! Drunk gets nine months in violin case
+NEWS! Enraged cow injures farmer with ax
+NEWS! Iraqi head seeks arms
+NEWS! Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers
+NEWS! Stolen painting found by tree
+NEWS! Survivor of siamese twins joins parents
+NO! Taco Bell is NOT the Mexican Phone Company!
+NUMBER CRUNCHING: Jumping on a Computer.
+Naaah, real men don't read docs.
+Nanosecond: Mork's stunt man.
+Neil Armstrong tripped.
+Neither rain, nor snow, nor l?ne n*oi*se
+Neurotic: Self-taut person.
+Never argue with a woman when she's tired, or rested.
+Never assume. It makes an 'ass' out of 'u' and 'me'.
+Never count your chickens before they rip your lips off.
+Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you
+Never eat anything bigger than your head.
+Never eat more than you can lift.
+Never enter a battle of wits unarmed.
+Never go with the odds
+Never hit a man with glasses. Use your fist!
+Never judge a man by his taglines.
+Never let your feet run faster than your shoes.
+Never mind the facts - I know what I know.
+Never park your hard disk in a tow-away zone.
+Never say, 'Oops!'; always say, 'Ah, interesting!'
+Never test for an error you don't know how to handle.
+Never trust a man who can count to 1,023 on his fingers
+Never trust a skinny cook.
+Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
+Never use a preposition to end a sentence with.
+New Highway gets Railroaded.
+Newsbytes - Microsoft announce EDLIN for Windows.
+Nihilism should commence with oneself.
+Ninety per cent of everything is crap.
+Nitpicking: Not just a hobby, it's a way of life!
+Nitrate: Lower than the day rate.
+No .sig is a good .sig
+No free lunch in an ecosystem.
+No one EXPECTS the Spanish Inquisition!!!
+No one ever said 'if I'd only spent more time in the office'
+No radio. Already stolen.
+No sense being pessimistic. It wouldn't work anyway.
+No wanna work. Wanna bang on keyboard.
+No, I'm from Iowa. I only work in Outer Space.
+Nobody roots for Goliath.
+Nobody shoots at Santa Claus.
+Nodding the head does not row the boat.
+None of you exist, my Sysop types all this in.
+Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
+Not a computer nerd; merely a techno-weenie.
+Not a real tagline, but an incredible soy substitute.
+Not many people realize just how well known I am.
+Not now, John, we gotta get on with the game show...
+Not quite human any longer.
+Nothing is 100% certain, bug free or IBM compatible.
+Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come
+Nothing is ever so bad that it can't get worse.
+Nothing is foolproof because fools are so ingenious
+Nothing is impossible for anyone impervious to reason
+Nothing recedes like success.
+Nothing succeeds like excess.
+Now entering Iowa. Please set your clocks back 20 years.
+Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.
+Now is not a good time to annoy me
+Now is the time for all good men to come to.
+Now that I've given up hope I feel much better...
+Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, know what I mean?
+O Oysters come and walk with us, the Walrus did beseech.
+OK Scotty, detonate and energize NOW! No, wait, I mean.......
+OK, I'm weird! But I'm saving up to become eccentric.
+OPERATOR! Trace this call and tell me where I am.
+OUT TO LUNCH - If not back at five, OUT TO DINNER!
+Obe Wan Kenobi at the dinner table: 'Use the FORKS, Luke!'
+Objection, your Honor! My client is an idiot!
+Objectivity is in the eye of the beholder
+Objects in taglines are closer than they appear.
+Of all the people I've met you're certainly one of them
+Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
+Of course I'm running Windows[kVxB NO CARRIER
+Oh goody! Another Muranium Explosive Space Modulator!
+Oh no you don't! You're not stealing this one!
+Oh no, not another learning experience!
+Oh, Bullwinkle, that trick NEVER works!
+Ok, I pulled the pin. Now what? Where are you going?
+Okay - right after this one we're BACK to the TOPIC
+Old MacDonald had a computer with an EIE I/O
+Old age is better than the alternative.
+On a clear disk you can seek forever.
+On a scale of 1 to 10, 4 is about 7.
+On an electrician's truck: Let Us Remove Your Shorts
+One atom bomb can really ruin your day.
+One good turn gets most of the blanket.
+One is never as happy or unhappy as one imagines.
+One man's Windows are another man's walls...
+One man's upload is another man's download
+One night I came home very late. It was the next night
+One tactical thermonuclear weapon can ruin your whole day.
+One way to better your lot is to do a lot better...
+One way to stop a run away horse is to bet on him.
+Only 19,999 lines of C++ to my next ski trip...
+Only cosmetologists give make-up exams.
+Only the winners decide what were war crimes.
+Open Mouth. Insert Foot. Chew Carefully.
+Optimization hinders evolution.
+Originality is the art of concealing your sources.
+Our houseplants have a good sense of humous.
+Our necessities are few but our wants are endless...
+Out here in the fields...I fight for my meals...!
+Out of Memory!? But I fed you 6 Megs this morning!
+Out of the mouths of babes does often come cereal.
+Outlaw junk mail, and save the trees!
+Overload--core meltdown sequence initiated.
+Oxymoron - Definite possibility
+Oxymoron - Military Intelligence
+Oxymoron: Bosnian Cease-Fire
+Oxymoron: Soviet Union.
+PC! Politically Correct (or) Pure Crap!
+PCBackup: 1 of 1362 disks.
+PI seconds is a nanocentury. - Tom Duff, Bell Labs
+PKZip - it's not just for downloads anymore
+Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.
+Palindrome isn't one.
+Pandemonium doesn't reign here... It pours!
+Paranoia is heightened awareness.
+Paranoia is simply an optimistic outlook on life.
+Pardon my driving, I'm trying to reload.
+Pascal: What's it Wirth?
+Passwords are implemented as a result of insecurity.
+Patience is a virtue that carries a lot of WAIT!
+Pay your electric bill in pennies.
+Peace through superior firepower.
+People are always available for work in the past tense.
+People say I'm apathetic, but I don't care.
+People who live in glass houses shouldn't!
+People who live in stone houses shouldn't throw glasses.
+Perot/Bush/Quayle: The Millionaire, Skipper & Gilligan.
+Pet Store: 'Buy one, get one flea.'
+Petroleum and coffee had no value a few centuries ago.
+Pi R squared. Nooo! Pie R round, cornbread R square!
+Pizza IS the four food groups!
+Plagiarism is the sincerest form of flattery.
+Plagiarism prohibited, derive carefully.
+Plankton lobbyist: 'NUKE THE WHALES!'
+Plasma is another matter.
+Please Tell Me if you Don't Get This Message
+Please call the windows police. I've caught another gpf.
+Please don't drink and post.
+Please don't take my sunshine away.
+Please recycle this tagline. Once is not enough.
+Pobody's Nerfect!
+Poets go from bad to verse
+Point not found. A)bort, R)eread, I)gnore.
+Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.
+Political panjandrums prologize pedantic paronomasia.
+Political power grows out of the barrel of a gun.
+Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.
+Positive: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
+Pound forehead on keyboard to continue.
+Power corrupts, but we need electricity.
+Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
+Predestination was doomed from the start.
+Predicting the future of technology is fraud with peril!
+Prejudice is the reason of fools. - Voltaire.
+Preserve wildlife... pickle a rat.
+Press <CTRL>-<ALT>-<DEL> to continue...
+Press any key to continue or any other key to quit
+Press any key...NO, NO, NO, NOT THAT ONE!!!!!!
+Procrastination means never having to say you're sorry.
+Procrastination: The art of keeping up with yesterday.
+Program too small to fit into memory.
+Programming is an art form that fights back.
+Progress is made on alternate Fridays.
+Prosecutors will be violated
+Psychiatrists stay on your mind.
+Psychoceramics: The study of crackpots.
+Push the limit, and the limit will move away!
+Put on your seatbelt. I wanna try something.
+Put people on hold when possible.
+Quantum mechanics do it in leaps.
+Quasimodo is a dead ringer.
+Question Authority, ask me anything
+RAID Antivirus - Kills Virus's DEAD!!!
+Racial prejudice is a pigment of the imagination.
+Radioactive halibut will make fission chips.
+Random order = oxymoron
+Rap music = oxymoron
+Read the dictionary backwards and look for secret messages.
+Real Programmers aren't afraid to use GOTO's.
+Real Trekkers work out at the He's Dead Gym.
+Real men don't set for stun.
+Real men write self-modifying code.
+Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle buttons
+Reality is an obstacle to hallucination.
+Reality is for people who can't handle Star Trek.
+Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
+Really ?? What a coincidence, I'm shallow too!!
+Recursive, adj.; see Recursive
+Red ship crashes into blue ship - sailors marooned.
+Reduce Carbon Dioxide emmissions - STOP Breathing
+Redundancy: A Politician with an airbag in his car.
+Refuse Novocain...Transcend Dental Medication!
+Remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.
+Remember, If you're not in bed by 10:30..... go home!
+Remember, Subaru spelled backwards is U-R-A-BUS.
+Reputation: what others are not thinking about you.
+Resistance Is Useless! (If < 1 ohm)
+Return((usBirdInHand = 2 * InTheBush()));
+Reverse the polarity of the neutron flow.
+Revolution is the opiate of the intellectuals.
+Road Kill Cafe: You kill 'em, we grill 'em.
+Roses are red, Violet's are blue, And mine are white.
+Rotisserie: a ferris wheel for chickens
+Round up the usual suspects!
+Rubber bands have snappy endings!
+Russian Express Card motto: Don't leave home!
+S met ing's hap ening t my k ybo rd . .
+SCUD : Sure Could Use Directions
+STICK: A boomerang that doesn't work.
+STUPIDITY is NOT a HANDICAP! Park elsewhere!
+SYNTAX? Why not--they tax everything else!
+SYSTEM ERROR: press F13 to continue...
+Santa's elves are just a bunch of subordinate Clauses.
+Sarcasm: barbed ire.
+Save California; when you leave take someone with you.
+Save energy: be apathetic.
+Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes!
+Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
+Save your money for a rainy day, or a new computer!
+Say yer prayers, y' flea-bitten' varmint.
+Schizophrenia beats being alone.
+Science asks why. I ask why not.
+Science: preconception meeting verification.
+Scientists discover life causes cancer.
+Scotty! Hurry! Beam me uragg^*z~% NO CARRIER
+Scrute the inscrutable, eff the ineffable.
+See how you can be?
+Seeing is deceiving. It's eating that's believing.
+Send lawyers, guns, & money...
+Send more tourists..... the last ones were delicious!
+Sentient plasmoids are a gas.
+Serving the scum of Paris for over 300 years
+Set mode=Extremely verbose
+Shareware author dies: .GIF at eleven!
+Shareware: forget the manual...phone the author at home!
+ShelfDoze is a registered Trademark of M$.
+Shell to DOS... come in DOS... Do you copy?
+Shh! Be vewy quiet, I'm hunting wuntime errors!
+Shin - a device for finding furniture in the dark..
+Shoot your program and put it out of its memory!
+Shoplifters with the runs take Clepto Bismol
+Short people are vertically challenged.
+Should I or shouldn't I?... Too late, I did!
+Should I weed the lawn or say it's a garden?
+Show me a sane man. I'll cure him for you.
+Sign here please:_______________________Thanks
+Sign on Closed Nuclear Power Plant... 'Gone Fission'
+Sign on a clothing store - Come inside and have a fit.
+Signito ergo sum - I sign therefore I am.
+Simon says: don't be so suggestible.
+Sit down, you're rocking the boat!
+Six of one, 110 (base 2) of another.
+Skating away on the thin ice of a new day.
+Slower Traffic Keep Right - Is that so difficult?
+Slug Sautee: a hors of a different d'oeuvre.
+Small changes pick up the reins from nowhere.
+Smash forehead on keyboard to continue...
+Smile. It's the second best thing you can do with your lips.
+Smile... people will wonder what you've been up to.
+Smiley faces were meant to be annoying.
+Smokey the Bear says, 'Strip mining prevents forest fires!'
+Smoking cures weight problems...eventually.
+Smoking is a leading cause of statistics.
+Smurf exterminator.
+So many bytes, so few cps.
+So many lawyers, so few bullets.
+So many pedestrians, so little time.
+So many toys, so little time...
+So much time, and so little to do.
+Socialism is the equal distribution of poverty.
+Software Independent: Won't work with ANY software.
+Software means never having to say you're finished
+Some Do, Some Don't, Some Will and Some Won't.
+Some People....
+Some days you're a bug, other days a windshield.
+Some days, nothing goes left.
+Some little dipstick stole all my good taglines...
+Some minds should be cultivated, others plowed under...
+Some people are so nice to be nasty to.
+Some people are, through no fault of their own, sane.
+Some things have got to be believed to be seen.
+Someone is unenthusiastic about your work.
+Something is rotten in the state of confusion.
+Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
+Sorry about your Rectal-Cranial Inversion.
+Sorry, I don't date outside my species.
+Sorry... my mind has a few bad sectors.
+Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (yep/Nope)
+Space is an illusion, disk space doubly so.
+Space is big. Really big.
+Spaceman Spiff, Interplanetary Explorer!
+Speaking only for myself, one of my many tricks.
+Spell chequers dew knot work write.
+Spice is the variety of life.
+Stamp out philately!
+Standing there making a sitting target of himself.
+Stay Alert. Stay Awake. Stay Alive.
+Steal my cash, car and TV - but leave the computer!
+Sterility is hereditary.
+Stop tagline theft! Copyright your tagline ©
+Strike any user when ready.
+Stupidity got us into this mess, why can't it get us out?
+Subvert the dominant paradigm!
+Suicide is the most sincere form of self criticism.
+Sumo Wrestling: survival of the fattest.
+Supercalifragilisticexpialidocius
+Supernovae are a Blast
+Support bacteria - it's the only culture some people have!
+Support the helpless victims of computers.
+Surprise your boss. Get to work on time.
+Swish, two, three, four! Swish, two, three, four!
+Sylvester Stallone: father of the RISC concept.
+THE GOLDEN RULE: He who has the gold makes the rules
+TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
+Tact: knowing how far to go too far.
+Tact: making a point without making an enemy.
+Tagline Lotto: 2222222222<- Scratch here for prize.
+Tagline theft is a compliment.
+Taglines \'tag-l\ 4inz \ The bumperstickers of the internet
+Take a bite out of crime .. Abolish the IRS!
+Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
+Take two crows and caw me in the morning
+Talk is cheap because Supply exceeds Demand.
+Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed.
+Teamwork is essential. It gives them another target.
+Ten weeks from Friday will be a pretty good day.
+Thank you very little.
+That ain't so good English!
+That must be wonderful! I don't understand it at all.
+That that is is not that that is not.
+That was ZEN -- this is TAO
+That'll be $67.50 CCCHHHHHIIIIINNNNGGGG!!!!
+That's inches away from being millimeter perfect.
+The Borg assimilated me & all I got was this stupid T-Shirt!
+The Czech's in the mail. Sending Frenchman by FAX.
+The French defense isn't...
+The Hubbell works fine; all that stuff IS blurry!
+The Lab called,..... Your brain is ready!
+The Magic of Windows: Turns a 486 back into a PC/XT.
+The Microsoft Motto: 'We're the leaders, wait for us!'
+The PARITY CHECK is in the E-MAIL...
+The Tour de France!
+The UARTs won't take this speed, Captain
+The Universe is a big place... perhaps the biggest
+The Vatican Express Card. Don't leave Rome without it.
+The backup's not over 'til the FAT table sings!
+The ballot is stronger than the bullet.
+The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.
+The best defense against logic is stupidity.
+The best defense is to stay out of range.
+The best substitute for experience is being sixteen.
+The best way to keep friends is not to give them away.
+The best way to win an argument is to be right.
+The buck doesn't even slow down here!
+The cause of problems are solutions!
+The cost of feathers has risen... Now even DOWN is up!
+The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
+The cream rises to the top. So does the scum...
+The days of the digital watch are numbered
+The dentist said my wisdom teeth were retarded.
+The dreadful burden of having nothing to do.
+The evidence before the court is...INCONTROVERTIBLE!
+The eyes are the mirror of the soul.
+The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it
+The first myth of management is that it exists.
+The first rule of intelligent tinkering is save all parts!
+The fish that escaped is the big one.
+The further I go, the behinder I get.
+The future isn't what it used to be.
+The game's a little bit wide open again.
+The gene pool has no lifeguard.
+The hand that turneth the knob, opens the door.
+The hangman let us down.
+The hardest thing about time travel is the grammar.
+The heart is wiser than the intellect...
+The irony of life is that no one gets out alive...
+The large print giveth and the small print taketh away.
+The little engineer that could
+The longer the title, the less important the job.
+The man who begins many things finishes few.
+The margin is very marginal.
+The meek shall inherit the earth, if that's OK with you
+The mind is like a parachute - it works only when open.
+The moving cat sheds, and having shed, moves on...
+The next thing to do is hang all the consultants.
+The only thing shorter than a weekend is a vacation.
+The option to override self-destruct expir@^%i@&$#NO CARRIER
+The pen is mightier than the pencil.
+The penalty for bigamy is having two mothers-in-law.
+The pendulum has gone full circle.
+The purpose of computing is insight, not numbers.
+The rich get richer; the poor get babies.
+The road to success is always under construction.
+The score didn't really reflect the outcome.
+The secret of the universe is~~*#~** FF * NO CARRIER
+The shortest distance between two points is off the wall
+The simple explanation always follows the complex solution
+The sixth sheikh's sixth sheep's sick.
+The soul would have no heart had the eyes no tears...
+The superfluous is very necessary.
+The thrill is gone, the thrill is gone baby
+The universe is a spheroid region 705 meters in diameter...
+The unnatural, that too is natural.
+The way to a man's heart is through the left ventricle.
+The weather is here, wish you were beautiful.
+The whole world is about three drinks behind
+The world is coming to an end. Please log off.
+The worst thing about censorship is **************************.
+The young know the rules, the old know the exceptions.
+Then somebody spoke, and I went into a dream....
+There are 2 ways to handle women and I know neither.
+There are many things I could say...
+There are no atheists in the foxholes.
+There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work.
+There is an exception to every rule, except this one.
+There is much Obiwan did not tell you.
+There is no dark side of the moon. Really.
+There is no finish line.
+There is no remedy for fun but more fun!
+There is no vaccine against stupidity.
+There is something to be said about me: 'Wow!!'
+There will be no last bus tonight.
+There's a hot place with pitchforks waiting.
+There's no future in time travel
+There's no such thing as a free lunch, but you can always find someone willing to treat.
+There's one in every car... You'll see.
+There's one in every crowd and they always find me.
+There's safety in numbers/When you learn to divide.
+Thesaurus: ancient reptile with an excellent vocabulary.
+They told me I was gullible ... and I believed them!
+Things are not what they seem.
+Think 'HONK' if you're a telepath.
+Think hard now! Which one is Shinola?
+This Charlie Brown must have been a very wise man.
+This Country Needs Group Therapy.
+This ain't no party...this ain't no disco...
+This door is baroque; please call Bach later.
+This is a Tagline mirror ][ rorrim enilgaT a si sihT
+This is abuse. Arguments are down the hall.
+This is just a hobby. Perfection is not required. Fun is.
+This is not a fairing, it's a force field.
+This is only a test.
+This is our only tag line.
+This isn't right. This isn't even wrong.
+This line intentionally left unjustified.
+This login session: $13.99, but for you $11.88
+This message has been UNIXized for your protection.
+This message is SHAREWARE! To Register, send $5.
+This message was typed on recycled phosphorous.
+This mind intentionally left blank.
+This program makes me look like a genius.
+This sentence is false.
+This tagline does not require Micro$oft Windows.
+This tagline intentionally left blank.
+This tagline is umop apisdn
+This tagline only to be removed by the consumer.
+This tagline was created from many little letters.
+This tagline was reclaimed and is not yet stolen.
+This tagline was written before a live studio audience.
+Those who can't write, write manuals.
+Those who can, do. Those who can't, simulate.
+Those who can, do. Those who can't, supervise!
+Those who live by the nit, die by the nit
+Those without heads do not need hats.
+Three can keep a secret, if two are dead.
+Tilt your chair back, your breath is effecting my RAM!
+Tilting at windmills hurts you more than the windmills.
+Time flies like an arrow - Fruit flies like a banana
+Time flies when you don't know what you're doing.
+Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so.
+Tis better to be hunter than hunted.
+Tis better to have loved a short than to never have loved a tall.
+Tis better to have loved and lost than just to have lost.
+To be, or not to be, those are the parameters.
+To boldly go and watch Star Trek re-runs.
+To do nothing is also a good remedy.
+To eat is human, to digest, divine.
+To err is human, to eat Jello, is messy.
+To err is human, to forgive is against company policy.
+To err is human. To really screw up it takes a computer.
+To err is human. To blame someone else is politics.
+To err is human. To moo bovine
+To every rule there is an exception, and vice versa.
+To iterate is human, to recurse, divine.
+To live in the hearts we leave behind, is not to die.
+To live well, know the difference between good and evil.
+To me personally, it's nothing personal to me.
+To shoot a mime, do you use a silencer?
+Today is Monday, cleverly disguised as Tuesday.
+Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.
+Today is the first day of the rest of this mess.
+Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday
+Todays subliminal message is ' '
+Tolkien is hobbit-forming.
+Tongue tied & twisted, just an earthbound misfit I.
+Too bad stupidity isn't painful.
+Too much is never enough.
+Too much month at the end of the money.
+Too much of a good thing is WONDERFUL.
+Toto, I don't think we're in DOS anymore...
+Touch if you must, Pay up if you bust.
+Toys are made in heaven, batteries are made in hell.
+Trees hit cars only in self-defence.
+Trespassers will be shot, survivors will be shot again!
+Tried to play my shoehorn... all I got was footnotes!
+Trig..a..name...o...tree!!!
+Truck Pulls: for people who cannot understand the WWF
+Trust me -- I'm a Lawyer.
+Truth is just another misconception.
+Truthful: Dumb and illiterate.
+Try to get back on topic, he said moderately.
+Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo
+Try? Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.
+Trying to think of a good tagline...
+Tubby or not tubby, fat is the question!
+Turn right here. No! NO! The OTHER right!
+Turning floppies into hard drives.
+Two Wrongs Don't Make A Right, But Three Lefts Do.
+Two heads are more numerous than one.
+Two most common elements: hydrogen, stupidity.
+Tyre Shop sign - We Skid You Not.
+UART what UEAT!
+UNNAMED LAW: If it happens, it must be possible.
+Uh, yeah...I MEANT to do that!
+Ultimate Question Research Team
+Unable to locate Coffee -- Operator Halted!
+Unburdened by the rigors of coherent thought.
+Unix and the world Unix with you; VAX and you VAX alone.
+Unless you're the lead dog, the view never changes.
+Unqualified superlatives are the worst of all.
+Until people grow up, they have no idea what's cool
+Use your MasterCard to pay your Visa bill.
+Users, losers -- what's the difference?
+Using yesterday's technology to solve today's problems, tomorrow
+VLSI: 'Getting High On Low Voltage'
+Vampires Against Mundane Poetry.
+Variables won't; constants aren't.
+Veni Vidi Visa: I came, I saw, I did a little shopping.
+Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.
+Volcano -- a mountain with hiccups.
+Vote Democratic... It's easier than getting a job.
+Vuja De - The Feeling You've Never Been Here
+Vulcans have less fun.
+Vultures only fly with carrion luggage.
+W.A.R.P.: We Are Real Programmers.
+WAITER! there's soup in my fly!
+WARNING ... drinking tap water can kill your thirst!
+WARNING: my messages are offensive to morons!
+WINDOWS ERROR #004: Operator fell asleep while waiting.
+WWhhaatt ddooeess dduupplleexx mmeeaann??
+WYGIWYD -What you got is what you deserved.
+WYTYSYDG-What you thought you saw, you didn't get.
+Waiter, there's no fly in my soup! - Kermit
+Walk softly and carry a megawatt laser.
+Walls impede my progress
+Wanna flirt with disaster? Become a SysOp!
+Want a LAUGH run a spell check on DSZ docs.
+Want a jelly baby?
+Want a stupid answer? Ask me anything!
+Wanted: Volcano. Average size. Must be active.
+War News: Saddam's army blown away by Thai hookers.
+Warning: Whimsical when bored
+Warning: Politicians can damage your wealth.
+Warranty void if tagline removed.
+Was today really Necessary?
+Wash your face in the morning, neck at night.
+Wasting time is an important part of living.
+We all live in a yellow subroutine.
+We are not a clone.
+We are the people our parents warned us about
+We don't care. We don't have to. We're Telecom...
+We have here the latest in primitive technology.
+We seem to have juxtaposed an impasse here
+We should limit congressmen to two terms: one in Congress, one in prison
+We take drugs very seriously at my house...
+We were unanimous - in fact everyone was unanimous.
+We'll give you piece de resistance and a tour de force
+We're as similar as two dissimilar things in a pod.
+We're lost, but we're making good time.
+We're staying together for the sake of the cats.
+Weeping, I wake; waking, I weep, I weep.
+Welcome to Texas, now go home.
+Welcome to the Church of the Holy Cabbage. Lettuce pray
+Well cover me in egg & flour and bake me for 14 minutes
+What are you doing?!? The message is over,GO AWAY!
+What can you do for me?
+What color is a chameleon on a mirror?
+What could possibly go wrong.
+What do batteries run on?
+What do you mean that 2 years have passed??
+What do you think?
+What does Santa do at a house with no chimney?
+What does ignorant mean?
+What does this red button do?
+What else can you do at 3:00 am?
+What garlic is to salad, insanity is to art.
+What goes around usually gets dizzy and falls over.
+What goes up has probably been doused with petrol.
+What has four legs and an arm? A happy pitbull.
+What's Irish and stays out all night? Paddy O'Furniture.
+What's another word for 'thesaurus?'
+What's brown and sticky? A stick!
+When 911 won't work .357 will!
+When in doubt, think.
+When their numbers dwindled from 50 to 8, the dwarfs began to suspect 'Hungry'
+When your opponent is down, kick him.
+Where does weight go when you lose it?
+Where in the world is Carmen San Diego?
+Who cares how it plays in Peoria?
+Who cares who's on board?
+Who glued the cup to the table?
+Who is 'they' anyway?
+Whosoever diggeth a pit shall falleth therein.
+Why am I asking all these things?
+Why are Chinese fortune cookies written in English?
+Why are you looking down here? The joke is above!
+Why are you wasting time reading taglines?
+Why aren't there many Hannukah specials on tv?
+Why can't we just spell it orderves?
+Why did you read this?
+Why do people cry when they're sad?
+Why do they tell us to watch 'The Today Show' tomorrow?
+Why do we elect people and then become afraid of them?
+Why do we read left to right yet turn pages right to left?
+Why do you think they call it 'find'?
+Why does it matter if we all put our pants on one leg at a time?
+Why does the beginning of your sentence end up in the middle of mine?
+Why don't ease, lease, and please sound alike?
+Why don't tomb, comb, and bomb sound alike?
+Why get even, when you can get odd?
+Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?
+Why isn't 'palindrome' spelled 'palindromeemordnilap'?
+Will Rogers never met a lawyer.
+Will the sound of one hand clapping still turn off my TV?
+Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat
+Windows Error #F99 - CPU too tired to continue...
+Windows N'T: as in Wouldn't, Couldn't, and Didn't.
+Windows NT: Only 16 megs needed to play Minesweeper!
+Windows NT: The world's only 80 megabyte Solitaire game!
+Windows NT: Vapourware of the desperate and scared.
+Windows error 000 : No errors found! [CLOSE]
+Windows is *NOT* a virus. Viruses *DO* something!
+Windows is for fun, Linux is for getting things done.
+Windows is the best GUI - It always sticks!
+Windows isn't CrippleWare -- it's 'Functionally Challenged'.
+Windows only crashes itself under Linux. Not the whole machine.
+Windows would look better with curtains.
+Windows: The answer to a question nobody has ever asked.
+Windows: an Unrecoverable Acquisition Error!
+WindowsNT: From the makers of Doublespace
+Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know.
+Wit is cultured insolence.
+Without Time, everything would happen at once.
+Without music, life would be a mistake.
+Women - can't live with 'em and no resale value...
+Women do come with instructions; ask them.
+Women get minks the same way minks get minks.
+Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.
+Women! Can't live with 'em and no resale value.
+Work off excess energy. Steal something heavy
+World ends today at 9:30 pm! Film at 11:00...
+Worry : The interest paid on trouble before it's due
+Worst-dressed sentient being in the known universe
+Would I ask you a rhetorical question?
+Yes my son, long ago mail was read 1 packet at a time.
+You buttered your bread, now lie in it.
+You can name your salary here. I call mine Fred.
+You can tune a guitar, but you cant tuna fish.
+You can't have everything...where would you put it?
+You hit the nail right between the eyes.
+You're it.
+You've got to be trusted by the people that you lie to.
+Young gorillas are friendly, but they soon learn.
+Your E-Mail has been returned due to insufficient voltage!
+Youth is a gift of nature. Age is a work of art.
+Yuk, what kind of dumb menu system is that? Oh, so that is Windows!
+Zen T-Shirt: Enlightenment Available - Enquire Within
+[DISCLAIMER: my fingers are epileptic]
+[If you can't hear me, it's because I'm in parentheses]
+hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY?
+Serenity through viciousness.
+FUN is never having to say you're SUSHI!!
+Include me out.
+YOW!! I'm in a very clever and adorable INSANE ASYLUM!!
+'That boy's about as sharp as a pound of wet liver' -- Foghorn Leghorn
+Pardon me while I laugh.
+Vegeterians beware! You are what you eat.
+Marriage is the sole cause of divorce.
+'From there to here, from here to there, funny things are everywhere.' -- Dr. Seuss
+You'll be sorry...
+The world is coming to an end. Please log off.
+UH-OH!! We're out of AUTOMOBILE PARTS and RUBBER GOODS!
+I used to get high on life but lately I've built up a resistance.
+Paranoia is heightened awareness.
+The things that interest people most are usually none of their business.
projects / infobot.git / commitdiff