1 What I can't stand is the feeling that my brain is leaving me for
2 someone more interesting.
4 I leave the show floor, but not before a pack of caffeinated Jolt gum
5 is thrust at me by a hyperactive girl screaming, "Chew more! Do more!"
6 The American will to consume more and produce more personified in a
7 stick of gum. I grab it.
10 I never until now realized that the primary job of any emoticon is to
11 say "excuse me, that didn't make any sense." ;-P
14 Il semble que la perfection soit atteinte non quand il n'y a plus rien
15 a ajouter, mais quand il n'y a plus rien a retrancher.
16 (Perfection is apparently not achieved when nothing more can be added,
17 but when nothing else can be removed.)
18 -- Antoine de Saint-Exupe'ry, Terres des Hommes
20 I'd sign up in a hot second for any cellular company whose motto was:
21 "We're less horrible than a root canal with a cold chisel."
24 She was alot like starbucks.
25 IE, generic and expensive.
26 -- hugh macleod http://www.gapingvoid.com/batch3.htm
28 Tell me something interesting about yourself.
30 -- hugh macleod http://www.gapingvoid.com/archives/batch20.php
32 We were at a chinese resturant.
33 He was yelling at the waitress because there was a typo in his fortune
35 -- hugh macleod http://www.gapingvoid.com/batch31.php
37 Three little words. (In decending order of importance.)
41 -- hugh macleod http://www.gapingvoid.com/graphics/batch35.php
43 N: Why should I believe that?"
44 B: Because it's a fact."
46 B: F, A, C, T... fact"
47 N: So you're saying that I should believe it because it's true.
50 -- "Ploy" http://www.mediacampaign.org/multimedia/Ploy.MPG
52 UF: What's your favourite coffee blend?
53 PD: Dark Crude with heavy water. You are understandink? "If geiger
54 counter does not click, the coffee, she is just not thick."
56 "There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the
57 right keys at the right time and the instrument plays itself."
60 Quite the contrary; they *love* collateral damage. If they can make
61 you miserable enough, maybe you'll stop using email entirely. Once
62 enough people do that, then there'll be no legitimate reason left for
63 anyone to run an SMTP server, and the spam problem will be solved.
64 -- Craig Dickson in <20020909231134.GA18917@linux700.localnet>
66 It seems intuitively obvious to me, which means that it might be wrong
69 Filing a bug is probably not going to get it fixed any faster.
72 Build a fire for a man, an he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on
73 fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
76 "...Yet terrible as UNIX addiction is, there are worse fates. If UNIX
77 is the heroin of operating systems, then VMS is barbiturate addiction, the
78 Mac is MDMA, and MS-DOS is sniffing glue. (Windows is filling your sinuses
79 with lucite and letting it set.) You owe the Oracle a twelve-step program."
82 Dropping non-free would set us back at least, what, 300 packages? It'd
83 take MONTHS to make up the difference, and meanwhile Debian users will
84 be fleeing to SLACKWARE.
86 And what about SHAREHOLDER VALUE?
87 -- Matt Zimmerman in <gYuD3D.A.ayC.nGB39@murphy>
89 She was alot like starbucks.
90 IE, generic and expensive.
91 -- hugh macleod http://www.gapingvoid.com/batch3.htm
93 You could say she lived on the edge... Well, maybe not exactly on the edge,
94 just close enough to watch other people fall off.
95 -- hugh macleod http://www.gapingvoid.com/batch8.htm
97 Guns Don't Kill People.
101 -- Maritza Campos http://www.crfh.net/d/20020601.html
103 "One disk to rule them all, One disk to find them. One disk to bring
104 them all and in the darkness grind them. In the Land of Redmond
105 where the shadows lie." -- The Silicon Valley Tarot
107 Miracles had become relative common-places since the advent of
108 entheogens; it now took very unusual circumstances to attract public
109 attention to sightings of supernatural entities. The latest miracle
110 had raised the ante on the supernatural: the Virgin Mary had
111 manifested herself to two children, a dog, and a Public Telepresence
113 -- Bruce Sterling, _Holy Fire_ p228
115 Junkies were all knitted together in a loose global macrame, the
116 intercontinental freemasonry of narcotics.
117 -- Bruce Sterling, _Holy Fire_ p257
119 America was far better suited to be the World's Movie Star. The
120 world's tequila-addled pro-league bowler. The world's acerbic bi-polar
121 stand-up comedian. Anything but a somber and tedious nation of
122 socially responsible centurions.
123 -- Bruce Sterling, _Distraction_ p122
125 The attackers hadn't simply robbed the bank. They had carried off
126 everything portable, including the security cameras, the carpets, the
127 chairs, and the light and plumbing fixtures. The conspirators had
128 deliberately punished the bank, for reasons best known to themselves,
129 or to their unknown controllers. They had superglued doors and
130 shattered windows, severed power and communications cables, poured
131 stinking toxins into the wallspaces, and concreted all of the sinks
132 and drains. In eight minutes, sixty people had ruined the building so
133 thouroughly that it had to be condemed and later demolished.
134 -- Bruce Sterling, _Distraction_ p4
136 Of course Pacman didn't influence us as kids. If it did, we'd be
137 running around in darkened rooms, popping pills and listening to
140 "It's not Hollywood. War is real, war is primarily not about defeat or
141 victory, it is about death. I've seen thousands and thousands of dead
142 bodies. Do you think I want to have an academic debate on this
146 THERE IS NO GRAVITY THE WORLD SUCKS
147 -- Vietnam War Penquin Lighter
148 http://gallery.donarmstrong.com/clippings/vietnam_there_is_no_gravity.jpg
150 Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
153 If you have the slightest bit of intellectual integrity you cannot
154 support the government. -- anonymous
156 Debian's not really about the users or the software at all. It's a
157 large flame-generating engine that the cabal uses to heat their coffee
158 -- Andrew Suffield (#debian-devel Fri, 14 Feb 2003 14:34 -0500)
160 "I was thinking seven figures," he said, "but I would have taken a
161 hundred grand. I'm not a greedy person." [All for a moldy bottle of
163 -- Sammi Hadzovic [in Andy Newman's 2003/02/14 NYT article.]
164 http://www.nytimes.com/2003/02/14/nyregion/14EYEB.html
166 "The question of whether computers can think is like the question of
167 whether submarines can swim."
170 "There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX.
171 We don't believe this to be a coincidence."
172 -- Jeremy S. Anderson
174 "A one-question geek test. If you get the joke, you're a geek: Seen on
175 a California license plate on a VW Beetle: 'FEATURE'..."
176 -- Joshua D. Wachs - Natural Intelligence, Inc.
178 "Ban cryptography! Yes. Let's also ban pencils, pens and paper, since
179 criminals can use them to draw plans of the joint they are casing or
180 even, god forbid, create one time pads to pass uncrackable codes to
181 each other. Ban open spaces since criminals could use them to converse
182 with each other out of earshot of the police. Let's ban flags since
183 they could be used to pass secret messages in semaphore. In fact let's
184 just ban all forms of verbal and non-verbal communication -- let's see
185 those criminals make plans now!"
187 "There's no problem so large it can't be solved by killing the user
188 off, deleting their files, closing their account and reporting their
189 REAL earnings to the IRS."
192 When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I
193 realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked
197 "People selling drug paraphernalia ... are as much a part of drug
198 trafficking as silencers are a part of criminal homicide."
199 -- John Brown, DEA Chief
201 Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on
205 If you wish to strive for peace of soul, then believe; if you wish to
206 be a devotee of truth, then inquire.
207 -- Friedrich Nietzsche
209 My spelling ability, or rather the lack thereof, is one of the wonders
212 Personally, I think my choice in the mostest-superlative-computer wars
213 has to be the HP-48 series of calculators. They'll run almost
214 anything. And if they can't, while I'll just plug a Linux box into
215 the serial port and load up the HP-48 VT-100 emulator.
216 -- Jeff Dege, jdege@winternet.com
218 Unix, MS-DOS, and Windows NT (also known as the Good, the Bad, and
222 CNN/Reuters: News reports have filtered out early this morning that US
223 forces have swooped on an Iraqi Primary School and detained 6th Grade
224 teacher Mohammed Al-Hazar. Sources indicate that, when arrested,
225 Al-Hazar was in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square and
226 a calculator. US President George W Bush argued that this was clear
227 and overwhelming evidence that Iraq indeed possessed weapons of maths
230 I'd never hurt another living thing.
233 -- Chris Bishop http://www.chrisbishop.com/her/archives/her69.html
235 Our days are precious, but we gladly see them going
236 If in their place we find a thing more precious growing
237 A rare, exotic plant, our gardener's heart delighting
238 A child whom we are teaching, a booklet we are writing
239 -- Frederick Rükert _Wisdom of the Brahmans_
240 [Hermann Hesse _Glass Bead Game_]
242 Of course, there are ceases where only a rare individual will have the
243 vision to perceive a system which governs many people's lives; a
244 system which had never before even been recognized as a system; then
245 such people often devote their lives to convincing other people that
246 the system really is there and that it aught to be exited from.
247 -- Douglas R. Hofstadter _Gödel Escher Bach. Eternal Golden Braid_
249 Fate and Temperament are two words for one and the same concept.
250 -- Novalis [Hermann Hesse _Demian_]
252 [Panama, 1989. The U.S. government called it "Operation Just Cause".]
253 I think they misspelled this. Shouldn't it be "Operation Just 'Cause"?
254 -- TekPolitik http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=59669&cid=5664907
256 Grimble left his mother in the food store and went to the launderette
257 and watched the clothes go round. It was a bit like colour television
259 -- Clement Freud _Grimble_
261 There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good
262 sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more.
265 Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired
266 signifies in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are
267 not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This world in arms is
268 not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers,
269 the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children. This is not a
270 way of life at all in any true sense. Under the clouds of war, it is
271 humanity hanging on a cross of iron.
272 -- Dwight Eisenhower, April 16, 1953
274 A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but
275 won't cross the street to vote in a national election.
278 A people living under the perpetual menace of war and invasion is very
279 easy to govern. It demands no social reforms. It does not haggle over
280 expenditures on armaments and military equipment. It pays without
281 discussion, it ruins itself, and that is an excellent thing for the
282 syndicates of financiers and manufacturers for whom patriotic terrors
283 are an abundant source of gain.
286 All bad precedents began as justifiable measures.
287 -- Gaius Julius Caesar in "The Conspiracy of Catiline" by Sallust
289 Any excuse will serve a tyrant.
292 Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for
296 I don't care how poor and inefficient a little country is; they like
297 to run their own business. I know men that would make my wife a
298 better husband than I am; but, darn it, I'm not going to give her to
300 -- The Best of Will Rogers
302 If a nation values anything more than freedom, it will lose its
303 freedom; and the irony of it is that if it is comfort or money it
304 values more, it will lose that, too.
305 -- W. Somerset Maugham
307 Sentenced to two years hard labor (for sodomy), Oscar Wilde stood
308 handcuffed in driving rain waiting for transport to prison. "If this
309 is the way Queen Victoria treats her prisoners," he remarked, "she
310 doesn't deserve to have any."
312 The sheer ponderousness of the panel's opinion ... refutes its thesis
313 far more convincingly than anything I might say. The panel's labored
314 effort to smother the Second Amendment by sheer body weight has all
315 the grace of a sumo wrestler trying to kill a rattlesnake by sitting
316 on it--and is just as likely to succeed.
317 -- Alex Kozinski in Silveira V Lockyer
319 EQUAL RIGHTS FOR WOMEN
320 Don't be teased or humiliated. See their look of surprise when you
321 step right up to a urinal and use it with a smile. Get Dr. Mary Evers'
322 EQUAL-NOW Adapter (pat. appld. for) -- purse size, fool proof,
323 sanitary -- comes in nine lovely, feminine, psychadelic patterns --
324 requires no fitting, no prescriptions.
325 -- Robert A Heinlein _I Will Fear No Evil_ p470.
327 It has always been Debian's philosophy in the past to stick to what
328 makes sense, regardless of what crack the rest of the universe is
330 -- Andrew Suffield in 20030403211305.GD29698@doc.ic.ac.uk
332 If I had a letter, sealed it in a locked vault and hid the vault
333 somewhere in New York. Then told you to read the letter, thats not
334 security, thats obscurity. If I made a letter, sealed it in a vault,
335 gave you the blueprints of the vault, the combinations of 1000 other
336 vaults, access to the best lock smiths in the world, then told you to
337 read the letter, and you still can't, thats security.
340 Q: What Can a Thoughtful Man Hope for Mankind on Earth, Given the
341 Experience of the Past Million Years?
343 -- Bokonon _The Fourteenth Book of Bokonon_ (Vonnegut _Cats Cradle_)
345 This can't be happening to me. I've got tenure.
346 -- James Hynes _Publish and Perish_
348 I now know how retro SCOs OSes are. Riotous, riotous stuff. How they
349 had the ya-yas to declare Linux an infant OS in need of their IP is
350 beyond me. Upcoming features? PAM. files larger than 2 gigs. NFS over
351 TCP. The 80's called, they want their features back.
352 -- Compactable Dave http://www3.sympatico.ca/dcarpeneto/sco.html
354 This message brought to you by weapons of mass destruction related
355 program activities, and the letter G.
357 Identical parts aren't.
360 Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come.
363 If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
366 The solution to a problem changes the problem.
369 There is no mechanical problem so difficult that it cannot be solved
370 by brute strength and ignorance.
373 More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads.
374 One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness.
375 The other, to total extinction.
376 Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
379 For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing
383 The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing
384 that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot
385 possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to
387 -- Douglas Adams _Mostly Harmless_
389 <Clint> why the hell does kernel-source-2.6.3 depend on xfree86-common?
390 <infinity> It... Doesn't?
393 "For those who understand, no explanation is necessary.
394 For those who do not, none is possible."
396 Frankly, if ignoring inane opinions and noisy people and not flaming
397 them to crisp is bad behaviour, I have not yet achieved a state of
399 -- Manoj Srivastava in 87n04pzhmh.fsf@glaurung.internal.golden-gryphon.com
401 "Because," Fee-5 explained patiently, "I was born in the fifth row.
402 Any fool would understand that, but against stupidity the very Gods
403 themselves contend in vain."
404 -- Alfred Bester _The Computer Connection_ p19
406 Those who begin coercive elimination of dissent soon find themselves
407 exterminating dissenters. Compulsory unification of opinion achieves
408 only the unanimity of the graveyard.
409 -- Justice Roberts in 319 U.S. 624 (1943)
411 The beauty of the DRUNKENNESS subprogram was that you could move your
412 intoxication level up and down at will, instead of being caught on a
413 relentless down escalator to bargain basement philosophy and the
415 -- Rudy von Bitter _Software_ p124
417 The game of science is, in principle, without end. He who decides one
418 day that scientific statements do not call for any further test, and
419 that they can be regarded as finally verified, retires from the game.
420 -- Sir Karl Popper _The Logic of Scientific Discovery_ §11
422 [A] theory is falsifiable [(and therefore scientific) only] if the
423 class of its potential falsifiers is not empty.
424 -- Sir Karl Popper _The Logic of Scientific Discovery_ §21
426 I shall require that [a scientific system's] logical form shall be
427 such that it can be singled out, by means of emperical tests, in a
428 negative sense: it must be possible for an emperical scientific system
429 to be refuted by experience.
430 -- Sir Karl Popper _Logic of Scientific Discovery_ §6
432 It was said that life was cheap in Ankh-Morpork. This was, of course,
433 completely wrong. Life was often very expensive; you could get death
435 -- Terry Pratchet _Pyramids_ p25
437 "The trouble with you, Ibid" he said, "is that you think you're the
438 biggest bloody authority on everything"
439 -- Terry Pratchet _Pyramids_ p146
441 He was wrong. Nature abhors dimensional abnormalities, and seals them
442 neatly away so that they don't upset people. Nature, in fact, abhors a
443 lot of things, including vacuums, ships called the Marie Celeste, and
444 the chuck keys for electric drills.
445 -- Terry Pratchet _Pyramids_ p166
447 Physics is like sex. Sure, it may give some practical results, but
448 that's not why we do it.
451 Certainly the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you. If you don't
453 -- Robert Heinlein _Time Enough For Love_ p240
455 Cheop's Law: Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
456 -- Robert Heinlein _Time Enough For Love_ p242
458 An elephant: A mouse built to government specifications.
459 -- Robert Heinlein _Time Enough For Love_ p244
461 Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed.
462 -- Robert Heinlein _Time Enough For Love_ p250
464 There is no such thing as "social gambling." Either you are there to
465 cut the other bloke's heart out and eat it--or you're a sucker. If you
466 don't like this choice--don't gamble.
467 -- Robert Heinlein _Time Enough For Love_ p250
469 Do not handicap your children by making their lives easy.
470 -- Robert Heinlein _Time Enough For Love_ p251
472 In all matters of government, the correct answer is usually: "Do
474 -- Robert Heinlein _Time Enough For Love_ p428
476 Where I sleep at night, is this important compared to what I read
477 during the day? What do you think defines me? Where I slept or what I
479 -- Thomas Van Orden of Van Orden v. Perry
481 No amount of force can control a free man, a man whose mind is free
482 [...] You can't conquer a free man; the most you can do is kill him.
483 -- Robert Heinlein _Revolt in 2010_ p54
485 "Facts" are the refuge of people unwilling to reassess what they hold
488 LEADERSHIP -- A form of self-preservation exhibited by people with
489 autodestructive imaginations in order to ensure that when it comes to
490 the crunch it'll be someone else's bones which go crack and not their
492 -- The HipCrime Vocab by Chad C. Mulligan
493 (John Brunner _Stand On Zanzibar_ p256-7)
495 "I'm a rational being--of a sort--rational enough, at least, to see the
496 symptoms of insanity around me. And I'm human, the same as the poeple
497 I think of as victims when my guard drops. It's at least possible I'm
498 even crazier than my fellows, whom I'm tempted to pity.
499 "There seems only one thing to do, and that's get drunk"
500 -- Chad C. Mulligan (John Brunner _Stand On Zanzibar p390)
502 "You have many years to live--do things you will be proud to remember
504 -- Shinka proverb. (John Brunner _Stand On Zanzibar p413)
506 If you find it impossible to believe that the universe didn't have a
507 creator, why don't you find it impossible that your creator didn't
509 -- Anonymous Coward http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=167556&cid=13970629
511 Information wants to be free to kill again.
512 -- Red Robot http://www.dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1372
514 Leukocyte... I am your father.
515 -- R. Stevens http://www.dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1546