more larts

git-svn-id: https://svn.code.sf.net/p/infobot/code/trunk/blootbot@972 c11ca15a-4712-0410-83d8-924469b57eb5

diff --git a/files/blootbot.lart b/files/blootbot.lart
index c2a9ab59761351ad76f153c532bb0319f8b0bd44..69e0478a7c47a227e1b24510ac86b2493643f6ce 100644 (file)
--- a/files/blootbot.lart
+++ b/files/blootbot.lart
@@ -45,8 +45,10 @@ explains, ever so gently, that if WHO doesn't give the channel more information,
 farts in WHO's general direction
 flings poo at WHO
 follow's WHO with a gauntlet and ... scratch ... HUMILIATION
+forces WHO to use Outlook Express
 frags WHO with his BFG9000
 gets a hotmal account and SPAMs WHO
+gives WHO a "free" copy of Windows and then charges double for "Upgrades"
 gives WHO a good seeing to
 gives WHO an extra strength ACME sleeping pill, sending WHO to sleep for 150 years, and awakening to seven strange dwarfs and a large apple
 grabs a large, mis-shapened log, with squirrels, and beats WHO until only the nuts remain ... which the squirrels run off with
@@ -57,6 +59,7 @@ holds WHO to the floor and spanks him with a cat-o-nine-tails
 hooks into a hydrant and hoses WHO down
 hurls dozens of incontinent, insomniac, hungry kittens with tiny little razor-sharp claws and a wide variety of contagious intestinal parasites at WHO
 installs a bad bootloader on WHO and turns WHO into a brick
+installs PocketPC on WHO's PDA
 judo chops WHO
 keeps mailing WHO free America Online CDs until he drowns
 lowers WHO's priority
@@ -110,6 +113,7 @@ takes out a cattle prod and gives WHO a good jolt
 takes out a seltzer bottle and sprays WHO in the face. You know, one of those old-school seltzer bottles clowns have? Yeah those. Anyway, consider yourself spritzed
 takes out WHO with the trash
 takes WHO to the vet for a "special" visit
+teaches WHO that M$ Access is a database. No, really, a database. A real live multi-user... well, ok, not multi-user, but a database. Yeah, that sounds right.
 teaches WHO the basics, including how to RTM
 throws a AN/M-8 smoke grenade at WHO
 throws WHO's poor little doggy off a cliff
@@ -123,5 +127,5 @@ whacks WHO with the cluebat
 whips out a hot clue gun and makes sure that WHO is stuck to the floor
 whips out a shotgun, trudges over to WHO, and goes postal
 whips out a sword and chops WHO in half
-whips out his power stapler and staples WHO's genitalia to the ground
+whips out his power stapler and staples WHO's foot to the floor
 whips WHO with a wet and grimy noodle just because