--- /dev/null
+ THE ENABLE LIST: AN INTRODUCTION\r
+ ÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜ\r
+\r
+\r
+Mendel has asked me to write a few words on my perspectives on the \r
+production and validation of the ENABLE list. So here they are. Note that my \r
+contribution to this work began at the point at which the words of more than \r
+eight letters (for which MW10 was the only source) were added to the list. \r
+Thus the emphasis on MW10 in what follows. I should also note that my \r
+comments apply specifically to the ENABLE list with the "signature words" \r
+removed. While I understand the reasons for the inclusion of signature words \r
+(and indeed, contributed to their selection), I consider the list without \r
+signatures to be the base or primary version. It is certainly the only form \r
+of the list subject to objective evaluation. \r
+\r
+The most important thing to understand about the ENABLE list is what sort of \r
+thing it is. Do not criticise the list on the grounds of common sense, \r
+linguistic erudition, or references other than MW10. ENABLE is not a work of \r
+scholarship: rather, it is a work of scriptural exegesis. Its perspective is \r
+that the god Merweb (also called Mahweh) has given us a holy book referred \r
+to as MW10, which its devotees are required to take literally. Like all \r
+useful holy books, it is upon occasion obscure, incomplete and at odds with \r
+what we call mundane reality. Our job is to extract from this book a subset \r
+of its lexicon, according to certain rules, without going beyond the bounds \r
+of legitimate interpretation. Because it pleased Him to do so, Merweb failed \r
+to include in His revelation certain information necessary for this task, \r
+namely, consistent information about inflections and, for certain sets of \r
+words, parts of speech. In order to obtain this information, it has been \r
+necessary to consult with other interpreters of the tradition, such as the \r
+Hasbro CD-ROM, and, in extremis, the holy writings of other Peoples of the \r
+Book, notably the scriptures of the gods Ahweb, Rahweb and Webnew. Such \r
+consultations have been performed with care; when the letter of MW10 was \r
+inadequate, we at least attempted to remain true to its spirit and discover \r
+that which Merweb would have revealed to us, had He not in His wisdom \r
+decided to challenge us with a Mystery or two. \r
+\r
+There was also an issue here which does not occur with most Scriptures, \r
+which is that the revelation of Merweb is a continuing revelation. Since it \r
+is impossible for any mortal to accurately prophesy the future revelations \r
+of a divinity, of necessity we have had to be content with using the most \r
+current available texts. We have especially taken note of the new TWL98 \r
+revelation; as the most recent addition to the canon, its contents and its \r
+implications have great importance, and have significantly affected the \r
+final version of ENABLE. (Note that sinners such as ourselves have not been \r
+allowed to see the actual text of TWL98, lest it consume us utterly. We are \r
+relying on second-hand reports of its contents, which appear adequate for \r
+our purposes.) As Merweb continues to refine His Word(s), the ENABLE list \r
+will gradually become less and less reliable. We are forced to accept this \r
+limitation, but are cheered by the expectation that ENABLE will be succeeded \r
+by another more worthy (and more wordy) compilation before it becomes \r
+entirely useless. \r
+\r
+To give a simple example of the literalism required in the compilation of \r
+ENABLE, MW10 states that "oxymora" is the only acceptable plural of \r
+"oxymoron". Other traditions disagree, and the compilers of this list \r
+themselves would not be caught dead saying "oxymora"; nevertheless, the \r
+burden of literalism mandates that "oxymorons" not be accepted, even though \r
+no one can doubt that it is the plural most commonly used by unbelievers. \r
+(For the record, it should be noted that, even though their work is perhaps \r
+most valuable for those whose faith in the perfection of the Merwebian \r
+revelation is unshakable, the compilers of the ENABLE list consider \r
+themselves students of comparative religion, and profess no faith in \r
+Merwebian dogma themselves.) \r
+\r
+Here is another example of the difficulties of interpreting MW10, in this \r
+case an issue on which the interpreters were unable to agree. Consider the \r
+word "omphaloskepsis". Meditate on it in the lotus position. An important \r
+and unique revelation of Merweb is that all singular nouns have plurals \r
+(even words like "contraoctave" and "ogham" which would seem to admit of \r
+*no* sensible plural). What, then, is the Merwebian plural of \r
+"omphaloskepsis"? MW10 does not show a plural, but Merweb answers many such \r
+questions indirectly, as described in the "Inflected Forms" portion of the \r
+MW10 Explanatory Notes. "omphaloskepsis" ends in -sis, so perhaps the \r
+statement that the plural of -sis is -ses applies. However, "omphaloskepsis" \r
+also ends in "skepsis", which is itself listed in MW10, without an explicit \r
+plural. Now the secondary sources come into play. "skepsis" is listed in \r
+OSPD (the Omnibus Scriptures of Pedantic Deities), a syncretistic work \r
+combining the revelations of Merweb with those of the other deities listed \r
+above, as well as the ancient and almost forgotten god Funkwag. OSPD states, \r
+without equivocation, that the only plural of "skepsis" is "skepsises", \r
+implying the similar form "omphaloskepsises". Other consultations were made: \r
+the Hasbro compilation accepts the form "omphaloskepses", and does not speak \r
+to "omphaloskepsises", since this hexadecagrammaton is outside the \r
+boundaries to which that compendium is restricted. The ENABLE compilers were \r
+unable to agree on the resolution of this conundrum. Mendel holds that \r
+Merweb could hardly have been so silly as to imply the existence of \r
+"omphaloskepsises", while I myself hold that if Merweb had wished us to \r
+accept "omphaloskepses", He would have so annotated either the entry for \r
+"omphaloskepsis" or the OSPD entry for "skepsis", lest He otherwise violate \r
+His own commandments and lead His disciples into confusion. Because the \r
+ENABLE list is intended to be used in circumstances where allowing each \r
+believer his or her own interpretation is infeasible, it was necessary to \r
+make a decision (and therefore, let all know that the plural *is* \r
+"omphaloskepses"); however, users of ENABLE should be aware that such \r
+choices were made, and we can only pray that the God was with us and \r
+moved us to choose correctly.\r
+\r
+Finally, I note that whenever Scriptural literalism is discussed some \r
+smart aleck is likely to bring up an error so egregious as to seemingly cast \r
+doubt on any reliance whatever on the authority of the work in question. For \r
+instance, a liberal Christian may challenge his Fundamentalist brethren by \r
+bringing up the passage in I Kings which implies that the value of pi is 3. \r
+I will bring up a similar case here, in order to illustrate how such \r
+objections may be disposed of. In its list of words beginning with the \r
+prefix co-, MW10 includes the apparently nonsensical word "coresidenttial". \r
+Does Merweb actually expect us to believe in this word, especially when the \r
+implied "residenttial" is not listed? Of course not. This is a human error \r
+in reducing the ineffable revelation to printed form, and of no more \r
+substance than the 17th century Bible which omitted the word "not" from the \r
+Seventh Commandment. We know better than to think that adultery is a moral \r
+requirement, and similarly, we know better than to attempt to play \r
+"coresidenttial" in a serious game of Scrabble (tm), no matter how great the \r
+temptation. (Some of us have been known, admittedly, to play it in our \r
+hearts, where it always falls on a triple-word score.) \r
+\r
+In short, our faith in the essential truth of the Merwebian corpus allows us \r
+to detect and overcome the insignificant errors which have occasionally \r
+crept in due to the God's necessary use of fallible man to bring His \r
+revelation to the world. Like previous interpreters of the tradition, we \r
+have no doubt that we have occasionally stumbled ourselves, but we also feel \r
+sure that any such missteps will be discovered in their turn, and all to the \r
+greater glory of Merweb and the marvelous language of which He is still the \r
+foremost avatar. \r
+\r
+\r
+ÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜ\r
+\r
+Scrabble is a trademark of the Milton Bradley Co., Inc. Forever and ever. \r
+Amen. \r
+\r
+\r
+\r
+\r
+---Alan Beale\r
projects / deb_pkgs / scowl.git / blobdiff