From: Michael Hanke <michael.hanke@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, 9 Nov 2010 21:43:06 +0000 (-0500)
Subject: Andy's feedback
X-Git-Url: https://git.donarmstrong.com/?a=commitdiff_plain;h=b1fde9bb680f0b88fcd528223e43634cb7d3b275;p=neurodebian.git

Andy's feedback
---

diff --git a/artwork/brochure/brochure_debian-neurodebian.tex b/artwork/brochure/brochure_debian-neurodebian.tex
index 8211ef7..7d9b46e 100644
--- a/artwork/brochure/brochure_debian-neurodebian.tex
+++ b/artwork/brochure/brochure_debian-neurodebian.tex
@@ -58,7 +58,7 @@
 \section*{Debian}
 was founded by Ian Murdock in August 1993 with the goal
 to create an easy to install and maintain non-commercial GNU/Linux
-distribution that would be able to effectively compete in the
+operating system that would be able to compete in the
 commercial market.  Since then Debian established itself as an
 independent and unique project driven by more than 3000
 enthusiastic contributors all around the globe.
@@ -69,7 +69,7 @@ number of the supported hardware architectures.
 % Current installer of Debian has been translated more that to 60 languages.
 % (12 ???  officially supported architectures).
 % Well appreciated
-Widely acknowledged quality and openness of Debian made it the foundation of choice for
+The high quality and openness of Debian made it the foundation of choice for
 more than 120 derivative GNU/Linux distributions, such as Ubuntu and
 Mint.
 
@@ -115,7 +115,7 @@ Very (Special|Stable) Operating Platform
   requiring the most recent versions of software
 
 %\item[Testing] \emph{Constantly changing future release candidate}\\
-\item[``Always-ready-to-release'']\hfill\emph{Testing} (now \emph{squeeze})\\
+\item[``Almost-ready-to-release'']\hfill\emph{Testing} (now \emph{squeeze})\\
 %  What to become a next \emph{Stable} release candidate.\\
   Software versions known to be secure and of good quality.
 %  Software migrated from \emph{Unstable} which is known to be of good
@@ -179,7 +179,7 @@ a new name -- \emph{wheezy}.
 % could be simply 'Debian People' or 'Debian Community'
 
 Debian is the only major operating system developed
-solely by volunteer individuals that collaborate via the Internet.
+solely by volunteer individuals who collaborate via the Internet.
 Debian developers, teams or individual contributors improve the operating
 system not by writing new applications (in most cases), but by
 \begin{itemize}[nolistsep,topsep=0em,leftmargin=1pc]
@@ -190,9 +190,9 @@ system not by writing new applications (in most cases), but by
 \item providing user support
 \end{itemize}
 
-Packaged software in Debian have individual maintainers which are
-often also users of a particular software, and are therefore interested in its
-reliable operation. Certain field of applications have dedicated maintainer
+Packaged software in Debian have individual maintainers who are
+often also users of a particular software, and who are therefore interested in its
+reliable operation. Certain fields of applications have dedicated maintainer
 teams, such as Debian-Science or Debian-Med.
 
 %\columnbreak